Sunday, 12 July 2015

Cabbage



A man during the second world war was given the responsibility for ensuring children received sufficient nourishment from the limited foodstuffs now available.  Oranges and bananas, often beyond the price of many at the time, were amongst other luxuries no longer considered vital to keep the nation afloat.  This gentleman, who's name escapes me, decided that the answer was cabbage!  This combined with the 'Dig For Victory' campaign enabled the British population to be healthier during the war and the restrictions thereof that they have ever been since!    
However as I mused on this I cogitated also on how to cook this beast.  I looked closely at the fat, dense, wrinkled green creation in front of me and considered how like the rest of my family it was.
Dense, sums so many of them up, wrinkled takes care of others who will not be mentioned, and green, well, less said about that I suggest.


The wrinkles reminded me of the TV that the women watch.  While some refuse to lower themselves to the banal offerings (my sister insists on wasting her senility on X-box or whatever games) most will sit for hours watching programmes made in the seventies which are repeated several times a day (always with the same ending) and these women will get involved once again with a tour de force of bad acting!  The cabbage sums this up well.  Quite why there are so few couch potato size women around the family I know not, possibly the shopping sprees help there.  How can anyone with half a brain, and that sums up the family all to often, watch such badly made tripe beats me.

 
Worse still some would say, not me, is the way the cabbage reminds me of the men in the family.  Note how easily it stands alongside a, now empty, but full a short while ago, bottle of wine and half a bottle of beer.  Reminds me of the nieces husband and his fridge full of beer bottles for the cup final.  It turns out that was that fridges natural state!  He and his son probably have a fridge each these days.  The cabbage itself may be wholesome but the people around it require some improvement.



My delightful and best looking, indeed most talented and clever niece arrived one day last year and enabled my mobile to work!  So good was she that she managed to send a text to my phone and indeed from my phone.  I was glad as I had not managed to do so myself.  I indeed do not require the text facility as I do not have the friends to send meaningless texts to however it has some uses I suppose.  As she made her way homewards on the high speed rail network I sent her a text, well I tried to, as I typed all that would come up was CABBAGE.  So I gave up.  She understood, her dad had the same problem.  I blame her.




The weather is dreich, I sit listening to Radio 3 via the TV as the somewhat depressing fiddle violin quartet music is better than anything available elsewhere.  The boring tennis final is about to start and I suspect women everywhere are getting ready to waste hours watching.  I might drop in on the 'Tour de France,' a much more interesting activity, especially as by touring the country you see places you will never visit.  I read the 'Tour of Italy' might take a day out and pass by my window in a year or two's time, that will be good.  No cabbages there, unless I get on my bike to join them of course. 
Ah well, soon be time for bed....   


12 comments:

the fly in the web said...

And while on cabbages, what about the old saying 'I'm not as green as i'm cabbage looking...'

Adullamite said...

Fly, Our family motto!

carolincairns said...

Too hilarious! Probably because you just finished that Australian cleanskin wine.

Kay G. said...

There is something of the thought of you propping that cabbage in order to take a photo of it that tickles me. Did it ever roll away from you? And have you ever heard "On Top of Spaghetti" sung to the tune of "On Top of Old Smokey"? Sorry, I do have strange imaginings sometimes.

Lee said...

I'm one of those women who watched the men's Wimbledon final...I finally shut everything off here shortly after 3 am this morning.

I guess that's why you love football, Mr. Ad-Man...the ball reminds you of a cabbage...and the cabbage reminds you of family members. I hope none of your family members read what you've written about them, or you might end up being aimlessly kicked around a field, or thrown into a pot and boiled! ;)

Jerry E Beuterbaugh said...

All of that inspired by looking at a cabbage head, or was it from the natural gas generated after you consumed the cabbage head?

carolincairns said...

It is a fine looking cabbage BTW. I would have brought it home too. But I must say that is an awful lot of cabbage for one person!

Adullamite said...

Carol, That wine is about the cheapest Tesco offer and I say it is the best.

Kay, Cabbages do not obey my every word that is true!

Lee, You watch tennis till 3 am? You need a doctor!

Jerry, The cabbage is as yet unconsumed. It does however remind me of you!

Carol, Nothing is too much for my gob!

the fly in the web said...

Any neighbours you don't like?

You could use up the cabbage and stink them out by making your own sauerkraut.

I did it for a couple of years while in England and passers by hurried on their way...

Adullamite said...

Fly, Canny do this as the new neighbours are still quite nice.
Sounds a good idea...

Mo said...

Now I'm wondering what you can do with a turnip.

Adullamite said...

Mo, You keep my brother out of this!!!