Time/Timely

The good news is the clocks going back one hour and offering an extra sleep in the morning.  It goes without saying that I awoke at five, that was six and struggled to sleep properly until ten minutes before I had to rise.  Tsk! Struggling into the cold east wing I began looking for all the timepieces that required changing.  As always during the day others appear out of nowhere and I sometimes wonder why I have so many clocks is useful positions that I never notice except when the stop or require moving forwards or back one hour.  

Having succeeded in registering time in the house I looked to having my weekly bath, what with this being Sunday and all.  The boiler would not work!  It has been giving problems off and on and now it was just off!  The starter has decided not to start and the little red light says call for the man!  So I sent an email to the woman who calls the man who calls me and turns up probably sometime during the week.  Just as the weather turns winterish all the boilers fail, this year it's my turn.  Ah well, I suppose I can have a bath next week, no need to fuss is there. 

The thing about the Edinburgh derby is that you must realise the Heart of Midlothian always win it!  OK on occasion the wee team sometimes scrape a victory but since 1875, when we beat them one nil on Christmas Day, the Heart of Midlothian have always been the superiour side.  This is one of the blessings I have received, to be born into a Hearts of Midlothian family, how lucky is that! Hibernian fans, those few, those noble few who follow the wee team do not like this situation.  Indeed since we defeated them in the cup final, again, in 2012 one or two of the most likeable Hibs lads have only referred to me in grunts, and that via the web!  

Today the Hibs had some idea that they were in a position to defeat this mighty team, jokers that we are we played along with this allowing them to convince their feeble minded followers that a victory was on the cards.  Indeed they even managed to get the ball into our goal and with this one goal lead the happy bunch were celebrating a win long before the end.  90 minutes had been played, 4 more added by an excellent referee to cover injury time and other happenings at the end when cheering Hibbys had reality restored.  That great man Alim Ozturk strode forward into enemy territory, unleashed a shot from close on 40 yards and watched as it sailed into the air, dipped, and off the bottom of the crossbar rocketed into the Hibs net!  Oh what a shot, what a goal, what a laugh (in love obviously) as the Green and white clad lower orders stared in disbelief.  Once more they had failed to win, once more the BIG TEAM took a point, we should have had three) once more i expect to hear grunts over social media soon, when they come out of the pub/sulk/coma. 

Some feardies thought Hearts were going to lose?  Some, like me, are not old enough to experience the shock of being defeated by Hibernian.  Tsk!  The Edinburgh derby, one of the most one sided in the world.  Still, it's a giggle innit?   

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Ne'erday Derby

Sadly the New Years Day Derby has to take place a day late these days, tradition sometimes changes after all. However one tradition has not changed, the traditional Christmas Stuffing the Heart of Midlothian give to the Hibernian each Mid Winter.  The Glasgow based media are not inclined to withhold their animosity towards the Heart of Midlothian, especially since Chairman Vlad Romanov spoke out about their anti Hearts and pro Old Firm bias, referred to them as 'Monkeys,' and filled the press room at the ground with bananas!  Daily we see attacks on the Heart of Midlothian, until today unanswered as the club (that is Vlad) decided not to communicate with the media, and the clubs financial problems made into headlines at all times even though Rangers football club are indeed in dire straights.  Rangers as you are aware owe £49 million to the taxman, their new chairman has a business record that has caused consternation among the clubs better supporters and yet nothing is said in the media about this!   One story concentrates on the Heart of Midlothian delaying payment of wages to the players.  One thought is that this is because the bank behind the club has money troubles caused by the recession, another view is Vlad is delaying payment, by a month or more, to 'encourage' the better paid players to move on to other clubs!  Ian Black was thus found helping a mate redecorate  and the story was given much publicity that he had to do this to pay for his family.  I suspect his wage is sufficient for him to survive a month without payment without earning cash from friends.  However any story that makes the Hearts look bad gets good coverage.


Today therefore the Hearts traveled to Leith to meet the wee team with empty pockets but much more ability! The Hibernian journeymen (and where should this lot journey to I ask?) were brushed aside in spite of their thuggish brutal attacks on our players, and Ian Black in particular.  Clearly 'Blackie' was here to show them some revenge, and so he did, manfully baring the abuse (four ought to have been cautioned and only was was!) and running the game from start to finish.  We will ignore the missed penalty, that was just to rub it in at the end I suspect.  The 'jibe' about painting is the reason he showed of the T-shirt with "I'll paint this place Maroon," at the end.  However in my view the man of the match was in fact our left back Ryan McGowan. 'Gowser,' an Australian, gave the 'headless chicken' Ivan Sproule a torrid time, except when assaulted by the thug and he then reacted somewhat foolishly by headbanging the neds stomach.  Good refereeing allowed both off and 'Gowser' can happily go home rejoicing in a great victory and knowing he was the scorer of the first goal!  An enthusiastic performer, our of position, and bang on form, great player.  I just hope Manchester United were not looking, they canny afford him!  Apart from ten minutes after the break when Hibs attempted a new tactic, they passed the ball to one another, there was little to fear. The resulting three one victory, with substitute John Sutton arriving to play well and create two goals and finish them off, was well deserved.  The team spirit and solidarity showed from start to finish from the 'Maroons,' and the money troubles that create so much press has never affected their performances.  


A quick glance at the London Hearts site shows that 'Dave' the author has not made it home yet. So I will update you on the simple facts regarding this game.  So far the Heart of Midlothian have won 276 derbies of all types, Hibs have won only 200.  In doing this the Hearts have scored 1065 goals, Hibs a paltry 892, and I can assure you many that I saw were either 'offside,' or favouritism from referees! This may well be the most one sided Derby in the world!  I once met a Hibernian fan in London, he was in the hospital where I worked,his illness?  Blackouts and depression!  No wonder!


In these lazy days around the festive season I have spent hours stealing football matches on my PC.  Normally I dislike doing this but I really cannot afford 'Sky,' which I would have otherwise.  I am managing two or three games a day at the moment, or at least bits of games, and in opposition to this TV offers absolutely nothing!  How sad is this?  Still, I am happy, especially after today.  I just wish I was in Edinburgh so I could walk into work tomorrow and smile smugly at the Hibbys around me, not that I am one to gloat when my fellow man is down mind, but in this instance it is allowable!

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New Years Day

The day dawned early, as it usually does, bringing my half closed eyes into 2012 for real.  Having taken a quick glance at my previous Ne'erday posts I noted they were all glad to see the previous year pass and longing for a good one ahead.  I suspect many others will have found similar this morning - or afternoon in many cases!  Just after finishing breakfast, at ten fifteen, I wandered out to catch the fresh 2012 air.  The air around me didn't feel much different from last years although it is incredibly mild for new years day.  The BBC site claims it is 11 degrees here, that's 52 F would you believe!  In Edinburgh they always refer to such temperatures as 'Summertime!'  In Edinburgh, and everywhere north of the border people today will be greeting strangers with "Happy new Year,' or "All the best," as they pass, shaking hands with a few and possibly discussing the place of entertainment tonight.  The few I passed as I wandered the streets looked the other way as I approached, the English class showing through. Paul Theroux mentions in one of his books walking along a country park path on the English south coast. The path ran for around seven miles and he was alone, bar a solitary woman coming the other way.  As they met she 'looked the other way until I spoke,' and would have passed by had he not said the dread words, "Good Morning."  A typically English, and southern English, response.  One man was doing some joinery outside his house, he just glared as I looked in his direction and buried himself in his hobby.  Shops in Scotland, bar the 'Paki' ones (Don't say that it will cause a war!) are closed, transport non existent, although a few buses might run and taxis will be making a bomb in these three days. Shared taxis, those with two or more drivers sharing the duties, will run non stop for 72 hours!  They will disappear for a day after that mind, probably to count the takings!  A couple of shops here have opened, attracting a handful of customers, and newspapers are on sale, even though there is nothing to say.  In days of long ago football in Scotland took place on this day, usually the Heart of Midlothian would defeat Hibernian and follow this up with crossing to Fife on the second of January to defeat Dunfermline.  These were good days ruined by the Glasgow bigots who had it all brought to an end by their behaviour, or lack of it that is, so no football up north until tomorrow.  However the English have a game or two on, one has just finished and was the worst I have seen since 'Roseburn Rovers' took on a Rag, Tag and Bobtail Dunfermline outfit and got royally stuffed!  They blamed the goalie but as I said I only let in the first eight!  


Now I note that as the dog walkers fill the park the rain begins removing what passed for smiles from their faces.  The dogs are happy enough mind, rain, snow and gale force wind doesn't seem to bother them. For some reason I appear to have eaten too much these past few days, either that or the Italian Merlot is not what it ought to be.  I canny understand it, It cost £2:99 a bottle!  So as I sit here planning my 'get fit' routine, exercises, diet system, shopping arrangements, and then ripping it up and throwing it away now as  it saves time doing that later, I find myself hoping we all share a better year than the last, that Jesus speaks to each one of us, that we rise above the problems which will always be there and make the world a better place for ourselves and all the rest.  You all make my world a better place, that's for sure!

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Sabbath Football Joy, as normal.....

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Heart of Midlothian 2 Hibernian 0. Goals from Stevenson and Webster saw off the feeble challenge from the 'hump it and see' wee team.  The 'flair' with which they are famous (one day I will add that to the list of 'Myths that have no source,') was seen to be long balls up to the dope wearing the No 9 shirt. He fluffed it, several times!  Besides the usual attempt to decapitate and injure our innocent players the opposition offered nothing worth mentioning.  It was however pointed out that a club famous for having incompetent goalkeepers had a star man in their goalie today, and he still lost! 


The new shape of the Heart of Midlothian continues to develop.  Another season at the top end of the table is for us to expect, while the wee team suffer another season avoiding relegation.  While our noble players receive treatment for the bruisers obtained today they will rest, in between guzzling champagne, and while the fans indulge in reminding friends who support the Hibs, if they can find them (I appear to be persona non granta from one Hibs board) that Hearts are once again dominant, the Hibs folks will be in their beds!  I suspect the only thing Hibernian will do is sack the manager, although it is of course the chairman's fault that they are in this position, but he will be replaced by another numpty, probably McGhee!   However as I am not one to gloat when my enemy falls I will pass on such gloating, but I will feature the table as it stands tonight anyway!  This is fast becoming the most one sided derby game in the world!  Let us look at the figures.



Since the first derby, played at Edinburgh's East Meadows on the 25th of December 1875, which the Heart of Midlothian won by one goal to nil, there have been  618 derby matches. The statistics are as follows. 


Heart of Midlothian Victories : 276
Hibernian, the Wee Team :      200
Drawn games:                         141
Abandoned: (Hibs ran away in a huff) :  1


Goals scored:
Heart of Midlothian : 1064 Goals  
Wee Team:               892 


Interestingly Hearts have won more derbies on Hibs ground than Hibernian have.
Also interestingly, Heart of Midlothian have won more derbies on the Hearts ground than Hibs have.  Good innit?


I could go on, but I leave you with the table instead.

1	Rangers	5	9	13
2	Motherwell	6	4	13
3	Celtic	5	8	12
4	Hearts	6	3	8
5	Dunfermline	5	0	8
6	St Mirren	6	-1	8
7	Kilmarnock	5	2	6
8	Dundee Utd	6	-4	6
9	St Johnstone	5	-2	5
10	Inverness CT	6	-6	4
11	Aberdeen	6	-6	4
12	Hibernian	5	-7	3

The Future is bright, the future is maroooooooooooooooooooon!






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