Sunday Night

Sunday night entertainment was spent crawling through the ever darkening streets attempting to find a spot where I could picture the sunset and feature the large crescent moon.  By the time I found a spot it was quite dark and the moon itself looks awfully small in this pic, but it is there!  Wonderful sky tonight, the colours are hard to beat as the sun sinks below the distant horizon (there must be hundreds of them there, one goes down there every night!).  In spite of the beauty of the skies above I noticed that few appeared to notice.  How we miss so much by looking no further than our nose!  

Star

The football world was upset today by the news of Gary Speeds death. He was found hanged at home early this morning. Police state that no suspicious circumstances were involved. Forty two year old Speed was manager of the Welsh football team and had a good reputation within football.  Only yesterday he had appeared on a TV football programme and had spoken to one or two of his friends and appeared outwardly to be happy enough.  Both TV and radio have been filled with stunned friends and colleagues sharing their shock at his death.

The reason for his suicide is not yet known but several articles end with reference to the Samaritans and stress the importance of 'talking to someone' if a man has problems.  This is a wise precaution as many men feel despair at their various situations yet will not talk about it to anyone.  Some feel weak if they talk, others embarrassed.  The Samaritans, as well as doctors and other agencies have seen it all before and are well able to offer a non judgmental listening ear, and able to direct individuals to the help they require.  No man needs to suffer in silence!  

.  

Saturday Night Out

So I decided after the dubious replies this morning that I needed a night on the tiles.  I intended to seek the bright lights of the town centre (paid for by credit card) and eat at the 'Thai Curry House and Takeaway Massage' where I have, er 'friends.'  Then head for the 'Independent Bar' where the landlord assures me there are no drugs allowed on his premises. When I pointed out to him when I met him in the street yesterday that a chap flung a brick at the head of another in his bar he replied, "Yes he did, but drugs were not involved. Just needless violence."  I couldn't argue with that.  However it may be better I reckoned that I went to the 'Nags Head,' or whatever it is called now.  There again I hesitate, what with the doormen, sorry 'entrance control officers' and the 'incident,' I must reconsider.  'The Bull' has stood in the market place for well over a hundred years, serving the public and being well recommended by one and all. Once it was filled with farmers and their ilk as the market pens were opposite the entrance. Cattle, sheep, and servants would be bought and sold in between 'refreshment in the 'Bull.'  I think it is a legal 'must' that every market town or village in England has a pub in the centre called 'The Bull!'  Today there are few farmers there watching the football on one of the may screens, few young males watch it in the early evening as young females wearing pelmets arrive and distract them. Hmmm that might affect my heart too much so I am not sure about that one. There is of course the ancient 'Boars Head,' and the other place next door, a third watering hole down the road full of rich trendy folks (they think) stoned out of their head, all of which can give one like me an evening of fun and jollity (laughing at them).  Pubs restaurants, happy young people, loud music, wine, dancing......hold on, wait a minute, it's raining!  Well forget it, I canny go out.  I have a hole in both my shoes and I am not squelching about in my condition.  Now, what's on TV instead....?     




.  

Strolling Through the Town Tonight

I took a stroll tonight, about nine o'clock, across the park opposite. The dusk grants us the wonderful sight of deep blue skies and clouds tinged with the remnants of a setting sun. The trees stand tall, darkly silhouetted against the sky. Far off a star twinkles in one direction and an aeroplane slowly arcs round in another.
Leaving the darkness of the park the street lights seem harsh and even painful. However, the air is remains warm and still. The streets quiet. Only when one reaches the town centre proper does the Saturday life appear. Couples and small groups wander towards their destination, the club or one of the, oh so many, public houses. From 'The Swan' blaring, and decidedly unmusical, music breaches the decibel limit. A noise made worse for the occupants by the assistance it receives from several inmates. A thin young man waits while his shapely girlfriend collects cash from the 'hole in the wall,' then, hand on backside, hers, not his, they happily head to a watering place.
Large, suited men, stand outside the club and several public houses. How nice to know that the local doormen have all received a certificate from an authorising organisation granting them permission to bash someone's head in while assisting his flight for the door. I find that reassuring somehow. At one door, three hoplites banter with the collection of adolescents sitting in the marketplace. Adolescents full of testosterone, fear, ignorance and a desperate desire to be old enough to enter the premises so well guarded by the bruisers. Drivers opposite rush to their cars to deliver the 'chicken and chips,' or 'Special Kebabs,' to hungry souls to
lazy, or to drunk, to cook for themselves.
People pass another of the three pubs in the market square, intent on their evening. What are their thoughts? Are they happy? We all love a good time, and they appear happy. This is the entertainment centre for the town, that's why they are here. A penny for their thoughts, especially in the morning!
Wandering past the taxis ranked in a row, drivers mostly standing chatting, awaiting the evenings end when they would earn their keep and overcharge to their hearts content, I pass to girls headed the other way. I noticed them, well as much as one can notice to young lassies with their skirts up to their backsides and legs that stretch all the way to the ground. As they passed, their eyes watched me suspiciously. Did they think they had overdone it? Were they too noticeable? Was I just another dirty old man? Well yes! Of course I am. How old were they? They looked sixteen to me but were probably at least eighteen, maybe older. The two noses had raised themselves in the air as they passed, I suspected their legs would be finding a similar position before the dawn broke, although they may not actually be sober enough to be conscious of it at the time themselves.
A typical Saturday night and wandering around I thought 'I miss this.' But do I?
Having a ball is, well, a ball! But is this what my life is about? I miss the social life, but do I want to be drunk and wasting life again? Jesus has made himself known and that life, however much fun it can be, does not satisfy! There is more to life than that!
I saw also my inadequacies as I passed by. The inability to relate to folks. I am always so far from normality it seems to me. Too self conscious, to much a wimp, too dumb. Just too inadequate. I wonder if I will ever relate to folk normally.
The love of Jesus must be stronger than I thought. How could he want me when there is so many worthwhile folk out there?