Monday 24th

After a breakfast of stale bread and mushrooms, the mushrooms were growing on the heel of the bread, I decided I needed to both exercise and shop so I wandered far down the road to the 'Lidl' place where folks tell me things are real bargains.
The lied!  As in a previous venture there I found the store cluttered, confusing, prices badly displayed if displayed at all and the customers rough!  Not what I am used to in Tesco.  The bread was poor and overpriced, two items I bought were under false prices and nothing appeared to be cheaper than the regular shops, so why do folks claim this place is cheaper?  Not to me it aint.  The three main supermarkets have cheaper prices in my view, or maybe I just know better as to how to work them I wonder?  Having walked all that way in chilly bright sunshine I then had to walk all the way back again, not one person offered me a lift.  
Having discovered on Saturday just how unfit I am I rediscovered this while crawling back home. Several cups of tea and a long perusal of Jerry's new book I then had a choice of fixing the PC at last or painting the bathroom.  Here again I was wrong as I realised I had to make soup first.  Lentil soup of my own recipe, the kind of thing that puts hair on your chest, it certainly does that for the pot I make it in!  I will leave it fermenting overnight to see what happens. I may get a Nobel Prize for chemistry one day.  Then came the painting. However after struggling with the first coat, including the ceiling, including learning the art of falling off without landing in the bath, I decided that was enough and found myself fair puggled with all the effort.  The second coat can wait, and luckily I have the museum tomorrow so it may wait until Wednesday.  However after all this I still have loads of stuff that require attention!  How come I am so busy, in between medical assistance, that so much has not been done yet?  Do I need a secretary perhaps?
I would have written something much more interesting but I was forced to watch Hull City beating Brighton tonight. Tsk! 

The picture is just part of the old workhouse/hospital extension that caught my eye in the sun this morning.  Looking up you often see such things on buildings, on occasion they are interesting.

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Clearing the Mess!

Having reached the end of the week and not being forced to cover lazy skivers folks at the museum I finally started on the looooong list of things awaiting attention here.  I changed the bed for a start, and it's not even the end of the month yet, had the washing machine purring away, moved the plant and cleaned the window area as a man will soon appear to renovate the sodden wooden frames, laid out the pile of mail that requires answering and working out where the money required for this is to come from, placed my newly arrived 'old man's so much off the price Railcard' into my disintegrating wallet while dreaming of train trips far away, sorted the desk into some sort of organisation, sent an Amazon voucher to my niece for her 50th birthday (I burst into tears here let alone her) via her husband as she will not be able to work the email, checked if the bookcase I was admiring at the shop up the road was still on offer, it wasn't bah, inserted a working lightbulb into the common stair so we no longer walk into the doors as we enter, visited Tesco for the special offers and fell asleep.
How nice to have a day off!

The paining still awaits, I could not paint the bathroom as I had the dirty big plant in the bath while I sorted the window, the ironing of shirts had to wait because, well just because, (any offers to do it out there...?  oh!), considered rewriting the items prepared for the museum into some form of proper English but just couldn't face it, and I am now looking at the PC that I am rebuilding, awaiting the courage to continue the work.  It appeared so easy in the pictures!
So instead I have walked around the town looking at the sunshine while freezing all the while, how does that work?  I passed the shops where shiny things attract my wallet wandering down the back streets where I hoped to see more of the sun, instead I saw lots of kids and assorted people making the most of the last day off the half term holiday.  
So, shall I do the tricky PC work now?  Let's eat first....

Now as I was saying....hold on, Dundee United are playing Motherwell tonight!
Bye!

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Word Polis

Charles Green, the rabble rousing Rangers chairman, has upset the press and the chattering classes by admitting he refers to his Asian friend as 'Paki,' in routine banter.  Naturally the press are full of mock shock!

So how come 'Paki' is so offensive when it is mere shorthand for 'Pakistani?'  It was not offensive in the early 70's, except when used on Mr Khayam, "I'm Indian, not a bloody Paki," this very large customer would exclaim.  As he spent much money we always bowed to his wishes.  If he is not a millionaire by now he must be dead.  In the late 60's a habit arose in parts of England, spreading elsewhere later, for young men to shave their head and wear large 'Dr Marten's' boots.  Such of a rough nature would roam the streets, find an innocent Asian and use their boots to give him a good kicking.  Social workers and PC PC's today may imply these (usually) young men had little chance in life.  Others thought them a bunch of thugs.  Young men have to prove themselves and this leads to sometimes violent fisticuffs.  In other cases it means random violence against anyone you consider worthless, an enemy, or weak.  Therefore this habit of 'Paki bashing,' or 'Bovver boot dancing,' as it was sometimes called became a subject for the media to decry, although they printed the stories, plus pictures, on as many pages as they could.  From this white, middle class Guardian readers decided that the word 'paki' was racist and insisted it be outlawed.  

Today such 'word police' have added a great many other words which they, with no mandate from the free world, have decided are bad.  Those who disagree are shouted down and suffer the use of violent names being thrown at them, although such terms are acceptable to the thought police funnily enough.  But calling a Chinese 'Chinky,' cannot be any more offensive than calling a Scotsman 'Jock.'  However a worrying trend has now appeared, some Scots claim to be offended if called 'Jock!'  How can this be?  Scots soldiers, usually called 'Jock,' wear the term with pride, why then does some wee boy, educated by PC teachers with little understanding of the world or her own nature, find such a term offensive?  

In itself there is nothing offensive about any of these terms, however some folks wish to be offended, or wish to improve their 'community' (whatever that is) in the eyes of the world.  The use of any term that someone dislikes clearly must be avoided unless you intend to annoy them, but I find it strange how easily today people are 'offended' by words perfectly acceptable yesterday.  What changed?  Human nature has not changed, it is ever the same, it must be fashion, it certainly isn't a sense of 'love' for your neighbour.  If these PC people really wished to 'love their neighbour' they would not jump on the bandwagon of attacking Charles Green, their is sufficient reason to do this from a factual football point of view already.  If words considered unacceptable are banned why are so many other vile words considered acceptable, and who are you to decide?  Loving your neighbour does not mean using words they dislike, and Green's use of such in banter with a friend, who may use worse in response, is none of our business.  Generation gaps make a difference here as this minor fault in my eyes is a great fault in those under 35, reflecting they way they have been educated, and those who educate them.  'Train up a child in the way he should go and he will not depart from it,' even if he is taught incorrectly.  Few break away and think for themselves most of us hide behind the 'herd instinct' and do not wish to be different  that could cause trouble.  Thoughtfulness for another is easy enough, but jumping on a PC bandwagon is fun for many.

We go through fashions constantly.  Today political correctness, however you understand it, rules the world.  Tomorrow another fad will arise and much spouted by the chattering classes will fall from favour.  The spirit of the air deceives us to our face and we see it not. 

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Password

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This Means Trouble

On the 28th of June 1914 Gavrilo Princip, along with several others, attempted to assassinate Archduke Franz Ferdinand.  Princip succeeded where the others had failed, shooting both the Archduke and his wife.  As Ferdinand was heir to the throne of the Austro-Hungarian Empire, and Princip a member of 'Young Bosnia,' a group supported by the Serbian 'Black Hand,' organisation, this meant trouble, and trouble in a big way.
Europe had been creating empires for some time.  These spent their time being wary and jealous of one another, fighting over land stolen from the peoples of Africa, India, South East Asia and wherever material gain was to be found.  Military alliances arose in order to prevent their empires destruction by other military alliances.  Pride, patriotism, selfishness and arrogance mixed well, but careful forethought was ignored.  How the spirit of the air laughed!
By 1914 the generals of all armies at least knew a war was inevitable, human nature being what it is, they also knew that if a war of movement was not won quickly a stalemate would lead to a situation they could not predict.  Millions of men were armed and ready for war, whether regulars, conscripts or reserves, millions were being spent on enlarging the navies, diplomatic sabres were rattling everywhere and a small blue fuse was all that was required to ignite a full scale, and welcomed by everybody, war. So it was in 1914. The death of the Archduke led Austria to demand 'satisfaction.' Serbia was invaded as Austria led her forces in a war to gain revenge, the blue fuse was lit.

While the British parliament urgently debated the 'Irish question,' fearing a civil war in that land, Earl Grey the foreign Minister interrupted their discussion to mention the death of the Archduke.  He added that this could be serious, they concurred but thoughtfully did nothing.  What could they do but wait?
Within days of the Austrian invasion (and defeat in the first battle!) Russia mobilised, Germany therefore mobilised, France mobilised, and suddenly Europe was at war!  Tsar & Kaiser, Emperor and King, politicians from all sides, had lost control of a situation.  A few stoutly preached peace, most raced willingly or unwillingly for war, caught up in forces out of their control.  
By the fourth of August, unexpectedly, Britain was at war!  Seven days from the assassination of a man in a nation most thought little of even if they knew of its existence a war that would cost ten million lives began amid much cheering!  This war was to leave a legacy that still resides with us, a war that changed the world for ever!


A week is indeed a long time in politics.  That shot meant trouble indeed!


Franz Ferdinand   Gavrilo Princip  The IWM Podcast refers to opinions from that time, listen in!

This means trouble also!  This is the dead PC that caused me so much grief.  This occurred when the engine, seen in the top left hand corner, began to smoke.  I soon realised this ought not to happen and switched off.  A new engine, or power unit if you wish to be fussy, arrived and has, after much blood, sweat and tears been placed in the proper place.  It works!  The fan goes round, the chip fan goes around, the hard drive fan goeth around!  The motherboard does not switch on.

Grrrrrrr!  I lay on the floor crying "Why me, why me..." for some time - before being thrown out of Sainsburys.  I think things may be getting to me.

Good job I am not one to complain.......


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Power and Beans!

As you will recall the power unit of my pc decided to take up smoking.  Bright little me deduced from this that there was a problem, no fool me!  Having struggled with the vexing laptop long enough, and only now having it under control, I managed to scrape money for a new power unit for the pc.  This afternoon I installed the brute and having done so I find the fans go around but the pc does not work.  Something is not right.  See I am clever.  A quick web search found too many helps available to make sense of this afternoon!  There was only one thing to do, I'm off to watch Euro 2012 instead!

Luckily I have stocked up sufficient food stocks for the Euro competition!   

I might need more pies mind......

   

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The Early (ish) Bird....

Spotted this pigeon earlier today as the sun was attempting to push through the dank Spring cloud cover.  It shoved its way past the cumulus now and then to the delight of those walking the dogs. Actually this chap was walking the dog, the other two broke away full of high spirits from a chap who daily passes by with seven dogs.  Usually the tails are wagging and the smiles are evident as the beasts thoroughly enjoy their trail, noses twitching, through the park.  He was somewhat loud in his rebuke as these two unwillingly returned, tails between their legs, after him yelling at them to "Stay," "Come here," and "Come back here," each time louder and more gruff than before.  I have never seen them do that before, possibly just high spirits and a female dog in sight.   

Recent days have been a bovver.  The PC smoking has ruined my life.  This laptop is slow, so veeeeerrrrrry slow, and it keeps doing things it ought not do!  Using this daft 'Touch Pad' causes trouble. The curser takes on a mind of its own, it races up and down unbidden, the pages change of their own accord, pictures disappear and the browser separates into differing browsers by itself!  I slammed it shut the other night as it was taking hours to change and I was most indignant with it.  I yelled at the world, got no reply, but yelled anyway.  The yelling began all over again when I went downstairs yesterday morning and discovered ANOTHER puncture in the rear tyre.  It had appeared OK when I got home yet here it was flat as my singing voice. It's a disgrace the way I am treated by technology!  And 'tyre' is spelled 'tyre,' not 'tire.'  Will someone tell this dumb American spellchecker! Don't they have schools in the US?

Sporting Life

Life did improve during lunch time however.  The Heart of Midlothian, Edinburgh's finest and Scotia's Darling's, once more walked, at half pace, all over the wee team from Leith, Hibernian.  This time we merely scored two goals to their nil, but we don't need to do much to prove our superiority over them again do we?  I wish them well in their fight against relegation to the lower division.  Maybe Rangers liquidation will secure their place for another season?   The marvelous Craig Beattie (pictured) scored the first goal from 'Man of the Match' Ian Black's wonderful pass.  Suso Santana rubbed salt into Hibernian's wound (snigger) with an even better goal in the last minute.  What fun!


A few hours later and more good news as the other half of the evil empire called the Old Firm (That's Rangers and Celtic to you) were defeated by Kilmarnock in the League Cup Final by one goal to nil.  A deserved victory for a team supposed to crumble in such an atmosphere.  Sadly the joy felt by Killie was ruined when the father of Laim kelly, a Kilmarnock player, suffered a heart attack at the end of the game. This follows on from the incident at the Tottenham Hotspurs v Bolton Wanderers game yesterday when a Bolton player, Fabrice Muamba, suffered a Heart attack on the pitch during the game.  The shock of his collapse causing  the match to be abandoned.  Both men appear to be in a critical condition. 
 Football knows its place at such times.

The afternoon saw the clearing of the skies later in the day, an end to the rain that had washed the pigeon off the lamppost, and left behind the first decent sunset for some time.  How nice to watch the sun descend slowly and brightly, causing alarms to go off all over the antipodes shortly afterwards, and leave us one of those wonderful skies.  Good morning Australia!

I hope this week brings good things, and no cardiac arrests, to one and all.

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Life Returns

After another two calls to Mumbai this morning, I cut the call off by accident myself the first time, I was convinced by a pretty young Indian lass that all would be well. Yet again this was an operator who had to stick to the script!  She did very well and was only perturbed when I asked where she was.  "India," she replied somewhat confused as people are not supposed to leave the script and she was more troubled when I indicated 'India' was a big place. Possibly she thought I might visit, fat chance, however she was somewhere I didn't quite catch, near Mumbai. Lunchtime and the Internet ceased once again and a noise outside forced my nose to the window.  There I beheld, and almost enfolded in my arms, the man from BT fixing the wires on the telegraph pole outside my window. Later, with one or two blips as he played around with the connection back at the exchange, I was left with the normal slow speeds that I have come to expect from 'Pipex,' or 'TalkTalk' as we must call them now. I checked my mobile phone for cost.  I have £3:62 left on the phone, (Virgin, 'Pay as you go') and I reckon there was about £16 in it to begin with, but cannot be sure!  Whatever, today's calls cast about £7 in themselves. Good job that phone was filled up some time ago when rich! Maybe I will once again compare prices of these ISP's. Still, all is well now and I no longer have to go outside and talk to real people.  



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Friday Mix

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Did the economy collapse again? Everyone is saying there's no more Jobs.

The media has been full of adulation for this man Jobs.  I find myself a bit underwhelmed. He may have been bright, inventive and very clever at getting his creations sold worldwide, but was he that important?  Did people see his 'Mac' and 'iPod' as earth changing, or did his fans see him as the good one and Bill Gates as the bad perhaps?  Gates certainly has not made friends by his attitudes and behaviour, but was Jobs any better? Gates at least is known to have given away masses of money, Jobs appears to have kept his £8 billion. This man has been almost worshipped in the media, several articles in all papers and histories of his life, his work and so on and on.  He died from a horrible disease, and that is terrible, his active m,ind created some interesting machines (which I have never used) but does the hero worship not reveal the empty part of us that needs a God to look up to?  Clever he may be, but surely the coverage is overblown?

   

This is the 'Swan' tavern.  You can tell that by the name 'Swan' written on the front.  I had a look through the web but in spite of this pub standing here since at least 1560, and some similar creation probably dates back for a thousand or two years before this, I could find no relevant information regarding this pubs history,  except a list of names of landlords for some years back.  How sad I thought.  Mind you it is some years since swans were found around here, ugly ducklings yes, swans no!

Intellectual Political debate in the USA reaches new heights! 

Is that you Max?...... Jerry?

I bet he's from the South!

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Football Over the Ether

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While twenty two men slug it out in the rain in Kilmarnock a great many people are sitting listening, or watching, in the comfort of their own homes. How wonderful! This game is available via the wireless on Medium Wave, although it may be the 'open all mikes' all in programme only. It can however be heard via the internet thanks to Sportsound's shambolic website,which is how I am listening on tenterhooks, actually I am on a second hand office chair, but as the butcher said when I asked for half a rabbit, "Let's not split hares!" The web has become a marvellous way with which to follow the football. Games worldwide, and sometimes pictures also, can be obtained this way, both legally and not. International fans of the Heart of Midlothian not only have 'Hearts World' struggling to provide an unbiased commentary on the game but they also get live pictures on occasion. 

To me this is amazing!  When I took up residence in the mouse filled condemned slum in London's Finchley Road I discovered that it was well nigh impossible to discover what was happening four hundred miles up the road. Saturday saw football results on the radio (did I have one then? I certainly had no telly) and the Sunday press had all the results. Reports of the games did not exist, with a cup final or old firm game as an exception and nothing was mentioned on the radio or among the population of the city in which I dwelt. Papers were available from the local newsagent. Papers from France, Germany, Italy and several other European nations. The Arabic press were represented, all the major papers from that region, and other from the US and elsewhere could be obtained a day or two after publication. None from Scotland could be obtained, although the Scotsman, then a newspaper, was then available in some areas. Later, once I had moved to a more salubrious basement in Kilburn (or was it when I had finally reached the goal of a back door in Notting Hill?), I discovered the Scottish Press could be obtained from Kings Cross station and the Sundays on a Saturday night before they made their way north. The joy of wandering about Kings Cross on a Saturday night is not one I wish to share with such gentle readers as yourselves! 

Football discussion was often limited amongst the people I worked with. They were either not interested or supported only English sides or, believe it or not, cared for cricket! The sight of working men getting excited about cricket is one I am even yet not sure about. It was of course possible at times to discuss football with those who understood the game, and from as far apart as Montrose and Real Madrid! However this was not relevant to the Heart of Midlothian. However my life had more important things to worry it as I built my 'relationship with Jesus, although he may disagree here, and this included the eight years I did without TV and used books and the radio to develop my incredible intellect. ( Well people always say "Incredible!" when mentioning my intellect!). Today the use of satellite TV and the 'Dirty Diggers' money football coverage has developed greatly. At the same time more newsagents found a market for the sale of Scots papers, a sale which is dying now we all read these grubby papers on the web! Ah well!

I now feel closer to Edinburgh and some members of my family and to my football club than I have ever done in the past thirty five years! The personal computer has been a great benefit in these and many other ways, how did I ever live without it? Unemployment of this period of time with no PC would have seen me dead! Who said "Shame?"  News of the team is available as easily for me as for those in Edinburgh. Pictures are available, and contact with the fans, especially the decent ones, is a great help to understanding what is going on. Incidentally this also enables me to remember Edinburgh words that have sunk deep into the back of my big head, but that's another story. The question now is why are we losing? Do we care when we hear Hibs are losing another cup tie to a very low lying side? Yes! That enables us to keep smiling in the rain soaked circumstances.

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A Problem Solved

I had cause to drag my weary bloated body outside into the sunshine today. From the north facing window I laughed at the English attitude of wearing shorts and T-shirts simply because the sun is shining. The cold biting wind howling up the street appears to go through them and they don't notice this! I have to laugh. However I put on my cap and jacket and made my way to the computer shop. I ignored the dank, cheap looking PC shop round the corner, the one with the dubious employees, and went to a safe reputable company. I was after a filter. I was assured by one of said company talking on local radio yesterday that this was the answer to my problem. The problem was that I could not use the PC and phone at the same time, one or the other was OK but not both together at it ought to be on broadband.

The shop was expensive, and the man there as cheerful and helpful as I would be had I spent the night sleeping rough in a railway station in mid January! So I disturbed you fixing someones machine, no doubt at great expense, and you had to sell me £4:95 worth of filter, which cost the company 66pence I presume, so sorry! As I questioned why it was different from the one I had in my hand you could have explained they came in a variety of shapes rather than be dumbfounded as I clearly was. Sorry I asked! However, in spite of my ignorant doubts and much confusion, it works! Now I can use both PC and phone at the same time. Nobody calls of course! I will set up the ansafone tomorrow and discover just how few people actually call! Not counting spam and bailiffs.

On the way back I wandered around by what we here call a river. Now having been brought up overlooking the Firth of Forth, which is well over a mile wide directly in front of me, I have to call this burbling stream of six to ten feet wide, a river? Tsk! Certainly during winter it helpfully bursts its banks and floods those houses thoughtfully built in the flood plain, but really to me it remains a wee burn, not a river like they ought to be. Still, as the sun shone and I began to sweat a little, I got a couple of snaps of the water, managing to avoid the plastic bottles, 'Costa Coffee' cups and floating bodies that pass by. Once again i could listen to the birdies sing in the trees, the water gurgling by and the splash as another urchin falls in when mum sits there smoking funny cigarettes. All part of life's rich panoply I guess. Crivvens it was warm when I got back mind. I was sweating like a pig, and here I was with my cap on and the jacket, cold in winter air, proving heavy and clammy in the sun. T- shirt tomorrow!

AAAAAAAAaaaaaarrrrrrgggggggghhhhhh!

So after the problem with the sound yesterday I recommenced work on this today. I clicked on something previously downloaded and everything collapsed. The PC would not get past the XP screen. It would not open in safe mode, it would not do anything!!!!!!!

Now I am not one to complain but I finally, after some time possibly days, I lost it and have reinstalled XP. This lost everything that was on the PC was lost, except those I have already downloaded. So I have spent time, too much time, searching for and reinstalling all the lost programmes and muttering somewhat wildly.

Of course the top bit was the Validation by Microsoft of the XP. It failed! Somehow it passed this in days gone by but now it has failed, why? I will tell you why, the E-Bay seller has been using illegal XP on all his PCs. I have since discovered others in the same position as I. Now I have no OS and do not know what to do - although screaming is barred as the noise disturbs the man downstairs and the police as they drive past.

Am I downhearted I ask? Using the cry used during the Great War. YES!!!!!!!!!!!!! is the reply.
However, worse things happen at sea.

Oh yes, last day of the month and I have just searched for and discovered my overdrawn status has been overdrawn again. Another 20 fine looms. Oh yes, and some of the "@# are in the wrong place!!! I canny wait for the driving tomorrow......................

Sunday Morning

As I struggled awake this morning my bleary eyes were greeted by the sight of snow falling and the ground disappearing under a blanket of wet, white, frozen rain. I realised I must stop sleeping in the park and find somewhere warmer. Looking around me, and while brushing the snow of my person I used many examples of Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia, none of which can be broadcast here, as I wished the snow to return to the Artic where it could do some good in fighting 'Global Warming!' Now this brings a thought to the forefront of my addled brain. 'Global Warming,' if it exists, why are we getting colder I ask? It seems to me since the fashion for 'going green' to 'save the planet,' this area has got wetter and colder. and this idea is considered right by most folk of my acquaintance. In fact in recent years the temprature has actually risen, and nothing abnormal can be reported by the metro..meter..weather folk. Once again our minds eye notices what is not there. A look through historical references to weather will find people complaining that the weather is "Worse than when we were young," and that the summers were "Longer, the sun hotter, than is is today." Lies, all lies! The weather in the British Isles never changes, it is always bad!
The day has been filled with fun! As I went for a bath, it appears the only way to heat myself up, Iset the 'Malware finder to scan. This took about an hour, and I returned when the water began to ice over. The room felt warm then! The burning of my lunch saw me set the AVG (Free) to scan while I attempted to enjoy my gruel. This took over an hour to run and found nothing but cookies from those adverts that fill pages. To be sure I then (foolishly) set 'SpyBot'(Search and destroy) to work. This took nearly FOUR HOURS to complete its journey through the PC! It found one,yes ONE cookie from an advertiser. (We do not collect private information, only information regarding pages visited, they lie) You can imagine the result. I had to do something useful, and in the end search for TV worth watching. Not eating yesterday left me with little energy, and that is a substance that appears to have vanished from my life about twenty years ago. If you find it, plese send it home.
This is good!
I stol...borrowed it from my friend Tom who's blog is well worth a look and is found HERE!

1. Open Notepad

2. Type "Bush hid the facts" (without the quotes)

3. Save it as whatever you like, wherever you like

4. Close notepad and open the file

5. Hmmm.

Hmmm indeed!

Typical Idiot!

Of course it had to happen! There I was, washing down the skirting board that was last cleaned when Maggie Thatcher was still kicking people out of work, and lo! There was the answer! I had moved the cupboard on which stands the non working printer, and noticed the cable had worked loose.

Now, apart from struggling (still) to fix the 'No Audio Device' problem, I also had to work out why the PC would not accept the 'All in One' Printer existed. This meant a trawl, long and arduous for a non geek, through the HP website. I spent a short eternity downloading drivers that I thought were going to update the thing, no they didn't. On top of which I wandered through the web looking for help. Non came.

Several days later I discover it was the cable coming loose when I had to shift everything to get the PC back in place. This is going in my new book, 'How to be an Idiot.' maybe however I would be better calling it, 'The Diary of an Idiot,' and just putting down the day by day acts of folly that cling so close? You ask why I gave up working on hospital wards do you......?