Resumption of Normal Boredom.

All Easter eggs ought to have been swallowed by now.  All carboard boxes in the recycling, paracetamol passed round for the headaches chocolate guzzling brings, and everyone looking forward to the next commercial money grab, whatever that is.

Having worked hard last week I have done almost nothing this week.  Annual paperwork has been attended to, eventually, online shopping for items to replace things that have shrunk in the cupboard over the last 18 months has taken place, and emails aplenty have been issued, received and answered, not that I made a penny out of this.

An occasional wander across the park, such as today to inform the council of my council tax paperwork, and a visit on other days for bread at Sainsburys.  

Easter is over and it is back to boredom.

 

Now bungling, bumptious Boris has opened the door to some holidays we can expect a mass loss of discipline across the nation.  Set limits will be treated like a visit to Barnard Castle, crowds will gather hither and thither having fun, assaulting police, fighting with each other and forgetting the virus is still around.  Marbella will be wonderfully full of English yobs if the Spanish allow it.

It may be some distance can be covered.  Caravans blocking the main roads will appeal to the 'Top Gear' fan.  Biker rallies everywhere will fill back roads and B&B's will be upping the prices to make up for lost time, those that are still in business that is.

How many cafe's, shops and hostelries will no longer open?  When the shops open barbers and salons will be OK but small cafe's?  Coffee shops and such like have not be able to pay their way, we lost one good one here, but I suspect the pubs will open, they usually survive.

There will be no more Lock Downs, all will be well!  So expect another wave and further LockDowns in June. 

 

Easter Monday Sleet

 

 

 

'Lost' sums up much of the day.

Freezing this morning, snow flakes flying about for a while, then later sun shining and fooling me into thinking it was warm.  It was not.  

The stale bread made me lurch up to the shop for goodies to feed my face.  With the usual Easter Monday Holiday weather keeping most inside there is little to tempt anyone out, bar the dogs of course.  So, manfully I ate and slept and watched feeble football, so uninteresting that I answered many emails instead.

Each email appeared to be concerned with Easter eggs for some reason.  Many desired to know if I had one, none suggested sending me any!  Luckily it fell to me three 'Creme Eggs' that happened to be lying about.  As I damage what teeth are left I will ponder on the spelling of 'Cream'  Why 'Creme?'   

Even 'Cadbury's' in the days when they were a proper business could not spell properly.  Either that or their marketing people were English educated.  I don't know.

These eggs, like much of their now American owned produce, were being made in Poland for a while. This in spite of the US woman in charge insisting they would not move production elsewhere.  She has been called to testify before the Parliament committee but remains out of the country for some reason.  I did read they changed the taste and are changing it back to the original again.  I also read somewhere production was returning to the UK.  Whether these things are true I know not but it is something to cogitate upon while stuffing the face.

 

Easter Morn 2021

 

 

This morning, long before I was awake, I shuffled down the road to St Paul's.  The road runs for about a one mile length and appears to me to be getting longer each time I wander down.  Funnily enough it appears quicker coming back, I wonder why?

Sanitised, masked, escorted to seat (near the front) by the 'sergeant at arms,' I found myself happy to be back inside in a well organised, disciplined, happy congregation.  

The other day a Polish church in London was closed by police.  They had a crowded interior, people crammed outside, and few wearing masks, with the choir boys sitting next to one another and no social distancing.  Yet they claim the police were heavy handed?  Vaccine or not, stupidity is not a good idea.  

 

We are limited to just over 30 people, and the place was full.  Wide spacing of course means the normal congregation cannot fit in, though many still remain indoors isolating.  The gray hair you see sitting to the right in this picture belongs to me, quite how it got gray I know not.  Mrs Vicar likes to photograph such gatherings while Mr Vicar burbles on.  It is fair to say we require barbers to open soon!

 

In spite of the Covid restrictions people were happy enough, Easter reminds them that Jesus is the purpose of life, his death for us, rising again while leaving our sins ransomed, and the offer of repentance for forgiveness gratefully received.  Add to this just getting out and about and meeting people in the flesh cheers everyone, and the sun shone through the chill pleasing us all.  

Easter eggs were also available and gratefully received. 

Hobbling home I turned to bacon rolls for lunch and football to relax.  Nothing much else happened as sloth was over me and I enjoyed that part of the day!

Maudlin Monday

 

 

After a restful football day yesterday, I fell asleep in every game, I wandered out twice today to grasp the sun and feel the chill of the northern wind.  Not really exciting but it meant I could avoid the no-news that filled the news today.  Indeed, almost more talk was of some bloomers in a Cop show on last nights TV than on real news.  Of course much space is given over to attacks on Nicola by the English news men (all news is Englsh owned) because she is the only opponent Boris has. The sight of so many demanding she resigns while not demanding this of ANY front bench Conservative from Boris down is a level of hypocrisy even the House of Commons has not seen before.

 

Easter approaches, therefore I have bought sufficient eggs for my many women.  If I fail to meet any, as I intend, I will have to dispose of them in a simialr manner to their Christmas chox.  Hmmm...My teeth are falling out!  The choice was somewhat limited I thought, overpriced and for reasons that make no sense a wide variety of expensive Bunnies are to be found.  Another commercial US money grab!  I refuse them. The use of eggs as a symbol of new life was around before Christ rose from the dead, so his early followers took it on.  I am not sure they had chocolate ones mind.    

 

My thoughts on Easter bunnies...

 

 

Easter 2019

The Easter eggs have for the most part gone the way of all chocolate.  The unbelieving public have eaten themselves sick, travelled to family elsewhere, visited the zoo, museums, old houses, parks and gardens, or sat by the sea while turning lobster red.  
The faithful gathered en masse (but not en masse in evangelical circles) to give thanks and worship and distribute eggs.... at least I gave away a few Cadbury's cream eggs to the little hooligans, none of whom refused.  Neither did the women when offered bar one who is banned from eating them by the doctor.  I will have that one later.
Easter was not observed after Jesus died, it does appear to have been around in some places by the end of the first century as I read somewhere John mentions this as to be observed at the Jewish passover.  It was certainly around by the mid second century.
Christians ought to celebrate this daily, not annually.
I note the government has taken time of from Brexit to support Jeremy Hunt's attempt at being Prime minister to protect Christians worldwide.  Jeremy, who as health secretary attempted to privatise the NHS by the back door, has been touring the world recently talking to the main world leaders and has mentioned such problems as Christians suffering persecution with many of them, not the Chinese or Indians as far as I can see however.  I wonder why?  
With the news of over 200 people Christians and tourists being killed in Sri Lanka by suicide bombers Theresa May has spoken of her feelings on the issue.  It is clear the Conservatives are attempting to get back the church vote they have lost over the years.  Quite how they will do this while Brexit is trundling along and they have given us austerity leading to an ever increasing use of Food banks throughout the land is not clear.  It would be terrible if some preacher was to read the Book of Amos to Theresa while she is in church being photographed by the media.  She might get a shock.
Easter is over, although it is not over, Christ is risen and is moving in his world, speak to him tonight, he might surprise you...

Halleluiah!

 

An excellent morning at St Paul's remembering Jesus rising from the dead, death and hell defeated and the potential for life, real life, everlasting given to us.  That said while we struggled through a couple of unknown songs, still unknown to me I must say, such songs reveal the lack of formality at this church, a friendly place that is informaly formal.  The most moving time was the kids search for hidden Easter Eggs.  That lasted about 35 seconds!   These were the 'Real Easter Eggs' produced to show the real meaning of Easter, you possibly didn't see them in the shops as while some like Tesco stock them they are usually hidden away.  Sainsburys neither stocks them or speaks about why though I am told they do Halal chocolate.  I wonder if this is true, you know how tabloids lie to the readers.

One miracle was waking tired and dizzy, unsure whether to go out or not.  Just before time I did rally and made it OK though I felt a bit faint early on.   However when I got home I realised I felt better than I had done for days and walked home quicker than ever having made sure I spoke to all the pretty girls first before leaving.  

While I took a handful of small eggs with me for the kids I myself received nil in reply!  Now I am not one to complain but I gave one to the pretty girls at work, small ones to the kids and my chocolate addiction continues, though sparingly at the moment as I have none to eat.  

Painted and decorated eggs go back a long way, some have been found in Africa dating to 60,000 years ago and the peoples of Mesopotamia and Egypt also saw eggs as a symbol of death and rebirth.  Some think Christians in Mesopotamia picked up the idea of painted eggs from Persia and later through the Orthodox Church it spread into Serbia and Russia and thence to Rome where it was adopted as normal practice.  On occasions symbolic colour is used but today the only symbol we note is the price of the egg.  

When we were young no eggs existed, sugar rationing did not end until 1954 I think and chocolate egg sales were slow to develop at a time when cash was short.  We did however paint hard boiled eggs and roll them down hills in the local park, though why we did this remains a mystery!  These were then scoffed and probably passed off as lunch!  Times were hard.  

I suppose the eggs found today have gone already.  Few will remain until tomorrow and then the kids will be threatened by a dentist visit!  Oh joy!

Bread, Bacon, Cheese and tea.

That was what I had for breakfast after I toiled up the old railway for another heart attack exercise time.  The problem with strenuous effort is that the hulking body that causes women to stop and stare requires fuel.  Now I had actually gulped down a fried egg sandwich before I left at six this morning, well 7:30 after I ate breakfast, but once I returned and walked to the shop for fresh bread I got tempted by the grub on offer.  

  
I have lived here 18 years now and still cannot get over the delight of passing green fields, country views, blue skies and the wide open spaces found outside the town.  Sometimes I wonder how and why we live in cities?  When the air is warmish and the beasties abound the mind is refreshed from all the gunk poured into it during the day.  

I returned to the gunk myself and continued searching for dead soldiers.  While interesting it drives my mind round the bend.  Happily I am on to something different tomorrow.  Life changes at Easter.  The kids swarm around the streets in packs, the girls with their noses in the air and their hair in a bun Victorian style, the boys trendy as always and as intelligent as a packet of peanuts!  

Is that house looking at me?

The politicians have taken the two weeks off to fiddle their expenses and travel the world on jollies! This means we will have less serious news, apart from the obsession with that South African murder trial, and the plane lost at sea.  The media forced to stay at home will be desperately searching for anything that will fill space no matter how insipid.  Hmmm maybe I ought to make a splash somewhere!  

Look, bunnies!  As I passed I noticed lots of bunnies making the most of the dew on the grass to have their version of bacon sandwiches.  This is not always a good thing as many farmers creep around at this time with shotgun in hand.  I heard several bangs this morning as I meandered along, young crops do not require rabbits says Farmer Jones!  Sad in some ways but if they are not culled they will destroy the farmers livelihood.  There were masses of them out today. As I wandered past the eggs, small eggs, packets of eggs, fluffy chickens a chocolate bunnies I wondered what has this to do with Easter? Even the 'Easter cards' had little about Jesus, indeed nothing but a flowery cross was on show, yet this is Easter, without him rising from the dead we would not be wasting money on all this chocolate!  Why are shops scared to say so?

I kept hearing the 'Beach Boys' song 'Country Air' as I pulled muscles all over my body.  It suits this place better than sandy Californian beaches I guess.  Not that I have seen the sandy Californian beaches, I did once see the shore at Southend however.  I breathed fresh air, listened to little birds chirp, almost fell over a dog or two and decided bacon for breakfast tomorrow and let the bike rest, it needs it.   

  
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Work!

I headed off to the museum to work this morning full of the joys of sleep!Here I was, trudging slowly down the road while on a normal day I could be heading back to bed, life is so unfair!  The school holidays are upon us so we run little activities which many regularly attend.  So today we had eighteen names down on the list, plus mums or grans, and about a thousand appeared to be in the building!  It was good of course, they all enjoyed it, they always do, a  chocolate egg was presented to those who had correctly filled out the quiz form, none failed when I do it, and a general peace fell over the building after they all departed.  
Of course the early day is always a hassle.  Nothing is in the right place, no money in the till and people at the door!  Once the kids arrive, wee Jack always first, there is the name checking, payments, details etc and the form for a quiz type trail to give out.  Naturally the openings for mistakes, confusion and the occasion pain in the whatsit occur.  I coped well, by passing the problems to others! 

The best part was the couple from Illinois.  Her mum had lived along the road from the museum, which was then a school which she attended.  By 1939 she was 18 and soon the place was full of US servicemen and the uniform, she said, attracted her.  Hmmm, not the chocolate, chewing gum and nylons then?  She married one and hopped off to the States.  Strange to say her home there was less modern than the one here.  Outside loos, something she did not have here, revealed the difference between real life and Hollywood movies.  They survived, worked hard and brought up a family. Reminded me a bit of my own folks. Good couple who's few days here have seen them return with a few souvenirs and several hundred photos!  Foolishly I forgot to take one of them or obtain their name. Idiot! They were great representatives of America!  That's what the place is for I say, people like them, and that is why I like it. Not forgetting the amount of chocolate I also obtained today.....

We have chickens in the shop, small fluffy things, bouncing eggs, cards, and other Easter paraphernalia, nothing about Jesus right enough.....

 .

Easter Aftermath

So Easter has come and gone.  The BBC as usual has offered a mixture of bland religious offerings, bar Melvyn Bragg's nonsensical programme supposedly based on Mary Magdalene.  Easter eggs have abounded once again, my collection somewhat less than my teeth hoped for, Tesco's et al will no doubt be offering some cheap tomorrow and storing others for next year.  Rubbish bags will be overflowing with coloured silver paper and dentists waiting rooms soon to be filled with frightened children.

Those same frightened children are also skipping school for a week or so.  This means fathers bring their children into the museum, are seen kicking a ball in the park with them, families meander through shopping centres,and groups of the little horrors are filling the streets, yelling, shouting and blocking the pavements.  While the behaviour in the skatepark is reasonable enough just now adolescents swarm like locusts in buses, shops, and anywhere normally used by decent people.  As I carried my weakened bug stained body through Tescos searching for bread I noticed gangs of wee brats everywhere.  If this is meant to be a holiday, where is the holiday from children I ask?

This man, Ian Duncan Smith, the secretary for the Department for Work and Pensions, earns £134,565.  He has been responsible for the amendments to the welfare state and the general oppression of the poor, the weak and anyone who cannot fight back.  Today he claims he could live on £53 a week "if I had to."  Some 250,000 people have demanded via an online petition that he attempts this for one week.  His reply is that he has done it already, twice having been unemployed.  He does not indicate how much dole he received  plus child allowance and other benefits, all of which indicate he is lying in his teeth.  

According to Wikipedia he is not unused to misinformation. Please refer to their tale for details of his education half truths.  His employment record does not inspire and that includes his failure as Leader of his party!  He has certainly been unemployed twice, so have I, and I struggled on both occasions.  The whole idea of publicising welfare payments is less to do with cutting the cost, certainly nothing to do with 'fairness,' but everything to do with encouraging middle England to vote for them by stigmatising the unemployed.  Call them 'scroungers' and the employed 'hard working families' (a Bill Clinton trick) and divide and rule.  Misuse of figures helps here.  This will get worse in the next few months as the Tory Party embarrass Ed Milliband on welfare.

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Cadburys Cream Eggs

I have just seen my first Cadburys Cream Egg advert! This is the first week in January! Some have claimed to have seen this ad earlier than me! Come on now, Christmas and New Year just over and here we are advertising Easter Eggs? Now I am partial to the odd egg at any time, and I understand why Cadburys sell them at every opportunity. In the early seventies when I worked (very hard I can tell you) in a Cash & Carry in Leith we sold tons of these eggs every year. The Scots palate is such that the shopkeepers would buy six or seven boxes of these eggs, with most chocolate bars one or two boxes were bought, if they had a school in the near neighbourhood they would soon be back for another six or seven! Guaranteed sellers at all times. In fact there was some idea of selling them all the year round a while back but that was an idea that did not come to pass. No doubt the major supermarkets will now be starting to add Easter eggs to their shelves and a three month sales push will begin.



DID YOU KNOW.....

In the 1400's a law was set forth that a man was not allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.
Hence we have "the rule of thumb".

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV was Fred and Wilma Flintstone

Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand

Q. What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All invented by women.

Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase.........
"Goodnight, sleep tight."

In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them 'Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.' It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.


And finally……

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!

I wonder if all that is true?