Election

So voting time has come again! This time our democratic system allows us the privilege of voting for a variety of unknown persons who wish to 'represent us' at 'County Hall' as members of the County Council. We also have the opportunity to select one of the fifteen parties who wish to represent us at the 'cash cow' that is the European Parliament. Oh joy!

So early this morning, with the sun shining brightly and the chill east wind blowing right up my trouser leg I sallied forth to obey my democratic duty. As I sauntered past the contents of a takeaway chicken dinner left by one of last nights less thoughtful revellers and kicked the green glass from another broken beer bottle into the gutter in an offhand manner I cogitated on the lack of information available concerning our hopeful contestants. Consider this, I am to choose one from a dozen names for the European election, and I know absolutely nothing about any of them! Fair enough there has been at least one five minute 'Party Political Broadcast' for most,if not all, of them, but this does not appear to me to inform us sufficiently regarding the individuals concerned with lining their poc, I mean serving the nation. Whether the slime balls who appear in such, nowadays often glossy, programmes actually tell us what their real objectives are is of course debatable. This means we cannot vote regarding the individual standing, only the party they represent. I consider this poor form. Surely the individual is more important than their party? Far too many vote for, or against, a party leaving themselves a man (surely it must be a man?) who may be rubbish at his job. Only when the candidates are much of a muchness should the party policy be important. What information we have we glean from leaflets through the door, and in our case a short 'pen picture' of the Council candidates in the local rag. There is NO information regarding the Euro contestants

There were leaflets through the door. The Conservative gave me at least three, each featuring his fat smug face and informing me of his quality while remaining silent regarding any expenses fiddle he may have undertaken while serving on the Council so far. The Labour man, his main opponent, only sent one leaflet, in an envelope, personally addressed to me and my neighbours. What a waste of space that is! The name labels (it used to be hand written envelopes) are attached to envelopes then pushed through letterboxes wasting time and insulting the intelligence of the householder. Do they expect us to vote for someone because a name is on an envelope? It certainly shows a disregard for cost and wastes much time, and that speaks volumes for the party concerned. Either way it matters not, both Tory and Labour put the leaflets for the 'Centre' district candidate through the door but this house is covered by the 'Eastern' region, so as well as wasting time and money they do not even know the voting boundaries very well! I will vote for their efficiency won't I?

There was a leaflet from the 'English Democrats,' one of the many racist parties formed in England today. Also one from the 'Green' party, the lunatic element of the Liberals of old. UKIP, (United Kingdom Independence Party,) the right wing Empire loving element of the Conservative party managed a leaflet, one of the parties who say "Fog in the Channel, the continent isolated!" Claiming to represent the UK they naturally care only for England. Of course the BNP also managed a leaflet, one which ignored the Nazi element and concentrated on 'British jobs for British workers. Their advert for this featured a picture of American workers, but never mind that eh? Naturally all these leaflets were more concerned with the County Council election and not the European one although I suppose it covers both.

On this occasion there were several others also casting their votes. In times past I have walked alone through that hall, heels echoing round the auditorium, with every eye behind the desk on me alone, each wondering what would go wrong with this one? On one occasion in London, just as I was about to enter the booth to vote a bedraggled woman came out from behind the small curtain then used to hide the voter and asked, "Where do I put my cross?" I was about to say, "In the pro-cycling, Anti-smoking, Men's Liberation Party," but I noticed the eyes at the desk looking towards us, heavy with weariness at yet another brain dead creature with the right to elect our representatives. Voting alone in the local election is something else. If so few vote is it no wonder the local Councils are filled with such self servers or incompetents? So I was glad I was not alone this time. I was surprised to be given such a long voting slip as I had not realised there were fifteen to choose from at that time. The Council election only had six, and that was easy enough but deciding from fifteen in such a small cubicle is disconcerting! Just who were

'Animal Count,' 'Jury Team,' 'United Kingdom First,' 'Libertas.EU,' 'No2EU:Yes to Democracy?' I was aware of 'The English Democrats,' and 'The Christian Party,' and those parties already mentioned but I had never heard of some of these! One man stood as an independent! What a way to throw good money away! The friendly staff were actually enjoying work, a change from the local council office from where they were borrowed I suppose. I put my crosses in the appropriate places, forced the papers into the box, smiled at all around, that worried them, and strolled out into the sunshine content that my democratic citizens duty had been accomplished. The small matter of neither of my choices actually getting in placed a small cloud on the day but that is nothing unusual I suppose. Normally I select carefully at elections however at one council election I voted for a chap I had seen often in 'The Goblet' in Rose Street. I knew he was into politics as he had been seen with the rest of his crowd at a strike in Rosyth which had absolutely nothing to do with them. It must be stated that Gordon Brown was one of this crowd, although I didn't know it at the time. Maybe I ought to have sent him a note saying 'I have the photos!' I suppose I would have ended up in Guatamano Bay if I had.

Soon we will be doing this again, this time for the big one. Our Gordon will declare a general election next Spring unless the backbenchers 'stab him in the back to his face' as one footballer once complained of a manager doing. Certainly the results will go against him today, and there is no doubt the greedy parliamentarians will have lost the Tories many votes also paving the way for the lunatic fringe to step up. One suspects that the thuggish racists of the BNP will find itself in a reasonable position this time tomorrow. Dearie me, roll on the next time I place my cross!