Tuesday 15 June 2021

Tummy Trouble


I have been very careful concerning what I eat these days.  Now my being slightly under 16 stone rather than well over it is in my opinion a good thing.  A not so good thing was one of those NHS online things that claim to tell you what you ought to way to avoid disease or instant death, this claimed I was 4 stone overweight.  Surely, thought I, only 2 stone?  
A study of their healthy breakfasts, lunches and so on convinced me I was going in the right direction.
However, it is clear these meals were prepared by a middle class women with lots of fancy kitchen gadgets, not just a pot or two and a microwave.      
My carefully controlled diet went a wee bit off course last night as I was invited out to the SPAM meeting at the local Liberal Club.  Spam, as you know, is the church men's meeting, or at least those men who's women allow them out at night.  This club is not a political club, just a place to gather in safety among decent folks.  Many of the men know their wives can drop in at lunchtime in perfect safety here, and they do, gossipping always being on the menu.
Now of course Covid restrictions are in place and we cannot wander about the club as before and so now table service has been introduced, this makes it even better!  No more going back and forth to the bar, she comes and delivers.  Then at the end off the night she asks you for the money.  Good idea, saves handing too much cash and after a drink or two who cares about the cost?
The main problem last night however, was Ian!  
Ian has always been keen to get everybody enrolled into this club, last night, before I had sat down, I found myself filling in a form promising to spend £20 for a years membership.  In my opinion this means I now must make my way to the bar club daily when I have better things to do.  You see, if I have paid £20 I must get my money's worth from it and that means breaking my routine to go outside and meet people.  Well, I may avoid that part...
 
Look!  Football is on! 

4 comments:

the fly in the web said...

I nearly had the trick for making Leo lose weight.
After cataract surgery I am not supposed to cook!Apparently the vapours damage the eyes.
He had the trick turned.
I will be supplied with scuba goggles tomorrow...

Adullamite said...

Fly, Tee Hee...

Jenny Woolf said...

Sounds as if Ian is a crafty chap. He'll be having you running the place next - watch out!

Adullamite said...

Jenny, Work? That does not sound like me...