Tuesday, 1 July 2014

Meat!



Having been convinced, by women as you may guess, that I am puny, weak, and a fat slob rolled into one ball of lard I decided to do something about this. So I struggled out to the shop and bought MEAT! Yes that red stuff that comes from cows, cows filled with antibiotics and other drugs, yes that stuff.  I went at a time when the cheap stuff was available, and it was not available, it had gone! I went to the not cheap at all stuff and it was not cheap at all.  I would be cheaper buying a cow! Anyway I came home with a few flat slabs of this red stuff and burnt some yesterday with tomatoes and mushrooms then washed it all down with 'Lucozade!'  Good old 'Lucozade,' the original stuff not the sports type that comes in bottles with 'teats' attached.  Just what is the point of those eh?  I forgot how useful Lucozade was.  I slept better after that meal, twice, and today I was busy at the museum, supported by 'Lucozade!'  Just as well as it was a busy morning and the staff all hopped it to a 'meeting.'  They were suitably bored while I entertained the visitors.  This use of the word 'entertained' does not require dictionary acceptance.  Hopefully I now have the rest off the week to myself, so I can do the woman's work that women will not do for me and iron some more shirts.  Thank you for your concern, I'm off to sleep again.....


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6 comments:

Jerry E Beuterbaugh said...

A good exhibit should always be highly entertaining. I would add that a good exhibit should also be highly educational, but one must do with what they have to work with.

Lee said...

Now that comic strip says it all!! ;)

I'm amazed that you've taken some notice of us wayward women, Mr. Ad-Man! Keep up the good work...and keep eating that red meat (it's cheaper to buy than having to pay for a funeral)...and eat more fresh fruit and vegies...lots more - again all cheaper than a funeral!!!!

Fold your clothes carefully and put them under your mattress. That'll do away with having to iron!

Take care.

the fly in the web said...

Lucozade!
I remember it well!

Why not get yourself a slow cooker and make stews?
Even you can't burn things in a slow cooker....

alan1704 said...

Ah Lucozade, the wonder drink my mother forced down my throat. Loved the taste but even to this day the smell makes me think of damp nights and the Flu. Sooner have Tuborg.

Mo said...

Ha ha missed your humour while I was away.

Adullamite said...

Jerry, So help me you will get a slap!

Lee, The funeral is cheap, I have a hole in the park ready for me.

Fly, I'm living off the stuff but will probably get a disease form it!

Alan, Many varieties for the Lucozade man today.

Mo, Humour, where...?