True Reports from British life .......!!! BRITISH NEWSPAPERS (it says...)
Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, 'We agree it was rather high for the time of year. It's possible Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house.' (The Daily Telegraph)
Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole salami in her underwear. When asked why, she said it was because she was missing her Italian boyfriend.. (The
Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van, because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle and they don't want the public to know what it looks like. (The Guardian)
A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guard spokesman commented, 'This sort of thing is all too common'.
(The Times)
At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coast guard and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his Land Rover off the cliff. ( Aberdeen Evening Express).
Mrs. Irene Graham of
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5 comments:
I particularly liked the first one!
Nice one Graham. I like them all but the last one made me laugh loudest. Thanks for brightening my Saturday morning.
Didn't they get the one about the sea rescue backwards? For I would think that teeth would most certainly be willing to go to the rescue of a lobster, but since I am not a marine biologist, I have no idea if lobsters have suicidial tendencies or not.
Job done, two happy and one confused.
Oi!! I can't stop chucking about the inflatable teeth and the lobster!! :D
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