Thursday 23 January 2020

Barber!


Today I had a haircut!
This haircut took THREE QUARTERS OF AN HOUR!!!!!
Yes indeed, almost half my day was spent in a barbers this lunchtime! 
The day started in the normal manner, I went back to bed after breakfast, and went downhill from there.  The idea was to visit the local shop for a haircut.  This proved impossible, not only were they busy but Jim was on all alone and he does not like me.  So I mused on another barbers, there are about 17 male and female hairdressers of various sorts in this small town, and I chose one that had been recommended situated next to Tesco.  This was the type of barber old men go to and I had a view in my mind what he may be like.
I WAS WRONG!
A man was having his hair cut, a man of, er, mature years.
A second was awaiting his turn.
I sat staring out the window at the world passing by.
I sat and waited.
I waited.
I waited.
I waited.
After a considerable time the barber (or was he a hairdresser?) finished fussing rather too attentively to his customer, clearly a regular.
He left.
The second man took his place in the seat (bought second hand from a dentist I wondered?) and the operation began.
I sat staring at the world passing by.
I waited.
I waited.
I waited.
The barber, as he had with the first man, fussed and fretted and talked.  
Man did he talk!!!
I waited.
I waited checking my watch every time the Town Hall clock opposite chimed.
I waited.
I waited and considered having to shave again when I got home.
Eventually my turn came.
The seat awaited me, I struggled to stand having been sitting since dawn and crossed the floor of the once well maintained shop. 
He asked my desire.
I bit my lip and avoided using the word 'quick' and explained why the mop on my head required fixing.
He began chopping, talking, fussing, combing, talking, fussing, cutting, combing, talking, on and on and on....
Eventually he finished. 
The haircut was perfectly acceptable.
He was still talking.
I rose slowly from the seat and walked through a mass of grey hair wondering where it came from.
Replaced my jacket and enquired as to the price.
£11 he charged!  £7 at Chris & Jims.
I noticed he only took £10 from the previous customer.
I said nothing, after ageing greatly of the previous hours I did not care to argue, I just wished to leave and get away from his talking.  I paid and made for the door.  he talked, he spoke, he talked and only another customer, yet another well into his 70's, entered, did I manage to make my escape.
The light had changed considerably since I had got up.  
As I walked into town I was struck by how quiet everything was, something I had not noticed before. Usually buses, cars, passers-by, talking women, music, workers children and other noises were noticeable. Today it all appeared so quiet.
I may go elsewhere next time...

     

4 comments:

the fly in the web said...

Why doesn't Jim like you?

Dave said...

At those prices I'm glad I dont go to the barbers anymore, what's left on top gets a run over with the electric clippers every two weeks.

Mike Smith said...

Just pour whiskey on your hair, Mr H - it will grow back half cut.

Adullamite said...

Fly, He's quite bright!

Dave, That is the best way.

Mike, I'll try that...