Wednesday 28 September 2011

Dear America....



red dirt girl said...

HILARIOUS!! Soubry and I argue over this phrase CONTINUOUSLY, because when I get mad, I say: I could care less .... truly, I could care less. I could care a -1 or a -698 less than zero which is where I happen to be at the moment of a serious mad. It's perfectly understandable.

And anyone with a house full of children and dogs will perfectly understand that holding DOWN the fort is quite a reasonable request. Kids are always experimenting with explosives and those doggie bombs in the house, well ..... Please inform the Queen that since 1776, English has no longer been her provenance. It now belongs to the colonists to use as they please ...!


Relax Max said...

That was pretty funny. As far as British Humouuur goes, anyway.

Let's start him off with one small fact though:

The name of our country is The United States. It stopped being called simply America back in 1781.

We DO know what you mean when you call our country America, but that doesn't make it like the Queen would want. See?

After you get that straight, then we will move forward to the others. :)

But I could care less, actually.

Unknown said...

Well, I find that piece quite disturbing. For I fully agree with the fact that saying, "I could care less," is absolutely stupid, and I find it a source of much irritation every time I hear some idiot (getting paid a lot more than they should) saying it on TV. It goes to the truth being that far too many in positions of influence have no idea what they are really saying much of the time. On the other hand, the part about holding down the fort is just plain wrong. For with the invention of explosives, it became possible to blow forts UP. Therefore, holding a fort DOWN by whatever means necessary is crucial to maintaining control over it.

soubriquet said...

She still doesn't get it...
Wilfully so. She does understand the reasoning, but is too stubborn to admit that she's been saying it wrong. Pesky colonists.

As for Max, well. We do know you don't really represent America, after all, your people only hold a smallish part of the conjoined continent.
Yet your people never seem to refer to theirselves a "United Statesians", no, when it suits them, they're quick enough to claim "America" as their own.

We, in turn, are quite aware that our "United Kingdom" is in reality a moderately disunited queendom.

If you people over the ocean want to speak wrongly, then please stop claiming to speak English.
Call it United Statesian instead.

Relax Max said...

@Soubriquet - Why was I expecting you to say that? :)

No, the title of the post, and of the dimwit's attempt at humor, was "Dear America" not "Dear Americans."

And if you can REALLY find me someone who says "I could care less" then I will show you a person who lives within 50 miles of Staten Island. Doubtful elsewhere.

Nobody does anything at all with forts anymore. Up or down.

Anyway, most of us understand that only the English speak that that limited language. Scots don't. Welsh don't. The Irish damn sure don't. Aussies speak Austrailain; Canadians speak Canadian and Americans speak... well, you see the point. Use a hyphen if you want, but anyone who makes a little film criticizing folks who don't follow his particular rules is a... what? An idiot? And if you can't understand me, then I'll stop claiming to speak English.

No. I could care less about him. (and his cutesy - arrogant, I mean - little insulting humor.) May god help us over here to someday speak English as well as the English. Especially in the north of England and in the Cockney environs of London. So perfect. I think the Queen probably has enough language problems to attend to right at home.

America is a place where the British used to have colonies, including Canada. We call ourselves Virginians and Georgians and Texans and, perhaps, bulldogs and Hoosiers. We are "Americans" as a group, only because that is part of our country's name. But we are not FROM America. We are, perhaps, from North America, but not from America.

Any person from the United States who answers the question, "What country are you from?" with the word "America", you can bet is in England being interviewed on the BBC and trying hard to fit in. He would not THINK of answering the same question that way if it were put to him in Oklahoma.

Your last paragraph sounds like it was written by a Frenchman, protective of a living thing that he really can't control and shouldn't try to control.

I could care more, though. A LOT more. :)

And one more thing. Harumph.

Relax Max said...

And FishHawk is only trying to suck up to Adullamite for his potential lottery largess. :)

Unknown said...

Relax, Max. I gave up on that a couple of weeks ago, and the truth be told, the cheap bugger probably never bought any tickets to begin with. (No, bugger doesn't count as a bad word against me because it is another laughable expression used by those who don't have any idea how to speak their own language!)

Adullamite said...

Having an intelligent discussion with Americans is like arguing with a five year old.

RDG, Colonists children playing with explosives does not surprise me.

Max, Your AMERICA. End off.

Fish, People on TV do not know what they are talking about? Who would have thunk it?

Soub, She is a woman, and as such just trouble. Max of course does not live in America, he lives in Mexico but will not admit this.

Max, Fort Knox exists.

Max, You are right,

Fish, I did too!!!

red dirt girl said...

Bah humbug on the lot of you. As a WOMAN, I could care less!