How lovely. The weather men have removed the freezing cold, the hail, the hailstones and the snow and replaced all these horrible 'Edinburgh style' weather patterns with rain! I suppose we ought to be glad that there are no icicles hanging from every nook and cranny, but the rain was filling my pockets of my cheap raincoat today! Although I am not so sure 'cheap' is the right word for the price paid! Rain has fallen steadily almost all day and will continue for much of tomorrow also. The ratbag on telly threatened snow if we don't behave and that means snow is a very likely outcome I would say. It's just a good job I am not the complaining type that's all I can say!
I have nothing to say. For the past few days (or is it weeks?) my mind has struggled to think. A combination of tiredness, (why am I always tired?) the bug, the cold, cold, weather, and have led to a lack of stimulation and a deadness in my little mind. (Strange that I have such a little mind when so many, many, people mention how my hat must be the largest in the town?) Today I actually feel quite happy inside, the morning job meeting went well, walking through the rain was enjoyable actually, until I realised how much rain had lodged in my pockets! And the milder weather meant I could open the window without wearing gloves, even those with the fingers cut off! However none of this stimulates my mind. There has been no photographs appearing in front of me as I wander about with the camera, although for the past few days the cold cutting through me did not help, and the world in a small town changes very little. (By photographs 'appearing in front of me I did not mean photographs 'appear' in front of me. I must make that clear.)
One thought that hung around for a while was the need to find myself a car. John, at the dole, insists this will help find work, as sop many jobs here (when they actually appear) are placed in out of the way places, such as farms attempting to make money, or industrial estates on the edges of towns, or near by-passes. The idea is good but the cash does not appear. I looked for a £500 banger but the one garage, if 'garage' is the right word, has closed down, and the chap who placed cars on the empty pavement near an industrial estate has not been doing so lately. The looks I got as I examined the cars parked there the other day! The problem, other than non existent cash, is that such vehicles cost more to maintain than to but, and one that will cost a reasonable amount would be far to expensive for me to risk. The story of my life really.
The other day I went to fix the bike. Easy I thought, the new cable was on, it just needs adjusting. However the lock I placed on it, to stop my neighbour throwing it out, has jammed! I cannot get it open no matter what. The other neighbour has offered me his cutters, but he has disappeared! There again I made a wonderful dinner, placed it on top of the cooker while I reached for something and the lot fell on the floor. Oh I could spit sometimes! The other day I cleaned the oven (I do it every couple of years whether it needs it or not) and the 'Mr Muscle' stuff I used has been poisoning me ever since! Just how toxic is this stuff, I wish I could find out? Even with all the windows open I have been breathing this stuff. After a day or so I switched the oven on and once again went to bed with a nose full of poison! I am afraid to use the thing in case I kill myself as I suppose there is so much still hanging around that it will poison everything I put inside the oven! I suppose I will have to use bicarb or some such and clean it all over again to remove the muck. I can't wait to see what will fall apart/go wrong tomorrow! Next time it just stays filthy.
Of course when I have nothing to write I could just put down the odd thoughts that run through my head. There are of course dangers in such an approach, dangers similar to those sci-fi stories where people are enabled to hear others thoughts. I think myself that hearing the thoughts of those you deal with could be very interesting if it could happen. The salesman desperate to make you part with cash would be on a loser at such times, the bosses real motive in giving you that 'special' job, the wife/husband's motive in bringing gifts and kind heartedness would be revealed, although I suspect they probably would be anyway. By being able to go into the mind of the checkout girl and listen to the wind howling through the empty space within, well that alone would answer some questions. The same could be said for understanding the reasons an Ashley Cole behaves so stupidly, or a teenager acts like they do, although that may make no difference of course as looking inside a teenagers head may not be either a good idea or lead to an understanding of what is going on, maybe just stick to the grunts on that one. I am not sure if I would be able to stand such a 'gift' for too long, especially as I spend so much of my time failing to understand the thoughts that do go around my head most of the day.
Possibly because I am not busy at the moment my mind throws up memories or images for no good reason. Suddenly an image of a green field, glimpsed when learning to drive last year appears, and very nice to, or a memory of a game we played as kids, or an aroma of flowers or cooking long forgotten suddenly fills my mind. Usually there is nothing but the usual gripes and daily routine there of course. One memory of an item the other day brought back many memories long forgotten and I was amazed at how fresh these thoughts were. The brain contains vast resources of information, mostly untouched, and we really need to make use of the information stored there, why waste our memories or our knowledge? Maybe I ought to write a book of useless trivia after all, 'Memories of a complete clot' should sell well, in the remainder shops! (Actually that reminds me, a well known Scots M.P. wrote a book about Celtic football club to commemorate their centenary, however it did not sell as the team was abysmal at the time, so to prevent it landing in remainder shops he bought 5000 copies of his own book!)