Clegg & Cigarettes

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Daily Mail

How long has Clegg got? This man's desperate desire to sit on the government front bench has turned his party and himself into a laughing stock. Having become a lackey to the similarly desperate Cameron he has brought into power a Conservative government and happily thrown away all his 'beliefs' in the process. There have been more 'U' turns by the Lib-Dems in the house of commons than on a major road during the bad weather. While claiming much of the government policy as Lib-Dem in fact the parts that will be put through are entirely Conservative! All their ideas are falling by the wayside and will soon be forgotten. However he is sitting on the front bench, he has a position of 'power' and he is the one that matters not his party or the nation! Not any more! The latest failure, to force his backbenchers to support the government position on student tuition fees was a farce all round. Vince Cable, a Lib-Dem, forced to bring in a bill he did not like, almost refused to vote for it, did so because he had to, and looks as big a failure as his millionaire leader. What a shambles this lot are! How long for Clegg? How long therefore for Cameron, another rich kid desperate for high office and happy to lead an unelected, unwanted government? The worrying thing for us all concerns what happens when this absurd coalition falls apart. The opposition comprises a new inexperienced Labour Party with bumbling fools in charge and they have no policy, no idea, and I suspect no hope! The futures bright, but nothing appears very bright in the house of commons!  

As I was standing at the window, harmlessly watching the girls in the park with my binoculars, I noticed a man standing on the pavement below. He then did a strange thing. He reached into his pocket and withdrew a silver cigarette case, selected one of the white killer sticks inside and placed this in his mouth. Replacing the case he then lit the cigarette and began to increase his lung cancer. Now I was shocked by this as I have not seen a silver cigarette case in use for a great many years. To be honest it was never likely in my family for anyone to have such an item, not counting my aunt, she worked for 'Jenners' (Where the rich shopped) and as such got good things on the cheap! We were only allowed in under guard. The rest of the family continued to dwell in poverty, a habit that remains with me today. During the days of my young childhood, which some suggest still endure, it was common to see folks taking cigarettes from those oblong packets of 'Capstan' or 'Senior Service.' I used to enjoy watching the smoke from my dad's cigarettes slowly curling and twisting into the air. Being told to "Clear off" because I was annoying, did not really compute. It couldn't as we did not have computers in those days did we? The sound of cancerous growths in my fathers lung I must say was not noticed at the time. Both film and TV stars continued to smoke well into the seventies, possibly even the eighties and in the days of black & white films many a director made use of the smoke to create atmosphere. This habit of smoking continued even though we were made aware of the dangers long before we left school in the mid sixties. The site of a lung preserved in an chemical did not stop us obnoxious brats wandering around coughing on our ''Cadets' or 'No 6' brands. It was an important part of adolescence to smoke 'Silk Cut' or some such as everybody else did, although our folks never knew of course. I was somewhat surprised when my dad asked if he could have one of my 'No 6' one day. "I don't have any," said I, "Yes you do they are in your top drawer." Never trust a father! I suspect today's youth know more about 'funny cigarettes' rather than 'Players.' Today China and those nations less aware of the dangers are recipients of heavy advertising by the tobacco companies. Such nations, China in particular, are now becoming aware of a huge rise in numbers of lung cancer victims, yet advertising and peoples ignorance continues. Why do we not ban this foul activity? I do not know? I suggest that we insist that those who smoke wear a black cowl and walk the streets ringing a small bell and crying "Unclean, unclean!"  The banning of smoking in pubs and clubs, businesses and all places where humans gather has already benefited all of us.The air is healthier, clothes worn in public houses no longer reek of others smoke, and only the beer spilled leaves a mark, not counting the falling down stairs and abusing police officers 'student style' of course.  The difference in attitudes over fifty years is amazing. Everyone smoked in times past, pipes, or cigars, then cigarettes became very popular during the Great War, given then to comfort the wounded and often advertised in the press as 'healthy!' Today it is the dumb minority that smoke, Nick Clegg smokes apparently, is this the time to mention this I wonder? It took so many years to realise how daft we were! There again today our streets are filled with the stour pumped out from the back end of oil guzzling motors and this is just as big a killer yet we are slow to develop a better system. The stupidity of the human knows no end.  

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Train

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Time for another steam engine picture I think. 'The Flying Scotsman' heads out on its journey to Edinburgh from London's Kings Cross station. What a thrill for the passengers, not only getting our of London but heading up to Edinburgh! How lucky can you be? Actually I am not sure this shot was taken at Kings Cross, it is some time since I took the journey and few today can afford the privatised prices anyway! From the 70's until the 90's I often took the train north. The best journey not being with the 'Flying Scotsman' but the 20:00 hours Aberdeen train that did not stop at Edinburgh. Actually it did, and arrived there at three in the morning. Even in the eighties they used old compartment coaches on that train, you know the type that only took eight people at a crunch? Few knew about this trip and I always had a dim compartment to myself. Now that was how to travel by train, as long as you didn't mind travelling at night. The best days of rail travel are behind me now. When rich I will buy a Rolls Royce, OK I will buy anything cheap that moves, and trundle around that way. 

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An Obituary printed in the London Times -

Interesting and sadly rather true.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common
Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for
sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago
lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as
having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- why the early bird gets the worm;
- life isn't always fair;
- and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies
(don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies
(adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when
well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in
place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from
school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired
for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his
condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for
doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in
disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get
parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a
student; but could not inform parents when a student became
pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became
businesses; and criminals received better treatment than
their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend
yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar
could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman
failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She
spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge
settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth
and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter,
Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was
gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join
the majority and do nothing.

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Door

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The village down the road, the one that attempted to stop the plague in medieval times by putting a rope across the street, contains this door. I wonder if......well maybe I shouldn't..... 

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Cold Freezes Thought!

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The cold has frozen my brain. Some would say they cannot tell the difference but I can. While the snow has disappeared for the most part around here the temperature is still low. As I sit here wrapped in my gray ex-army blankets, they were white when I obtained them, wearing out my toes on the remnants of heat coming from the heater, and listening to cheery wee girls informing us with happy smiles that it will not get much better soon I begin to dream of sun kissed South Sea Islands. The chances of my lard filled bulk ever lying on one of those white beaches next to turquoise seas is slight, but I will dream on just the same.

No pictures today although the sun did shine brightly at times. There was a wonderful cloud display as the suns rays shone through the gray layers as the sun dipped late this afternoon but I could not find a suitable spot to get the snap. Most annoying. Absolutely NOTHING else has happened! The list of things to do has several items crossed off, but I canny mind doing them, maybe it's yesterdays list? 

Anyway, for those who have not come across this, here is something that MUST have originated with a female mind......

Jesus was a woman. Because:

1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food.


2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it.


3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do.

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The Thinking Man

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The Town Lit Up on a Saturday Night

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Exciting, innit.....?

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England Lose -Shame!

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Daily Mail

So in spite of their natural inbuilt arrogance and demands that the World Cup should, in their words, 'Come Home,' England have failed in their bid to obtain the World Cup after all. Now the papers are full of cries of 'Unfair,' 'What did Putin promise,' 'They promised to vote and din't,'and 'Quatar? I thought that was an airline?' In short they feel cheated and questions are being asked about the organisation of FIFA. Imagine, FIFA being disorganised and full of cheats who break their promises? Who would have thunk it....?

There is no doubt the organisation of football associations world wide is poor. Full of yes men and 'suits' who can emit different lies with all four faces at the same time, and who's concern for the football fan is such that on occasion they have been known to answer letters addressed to them albeit with not actually saying anything within the answer! To expect the offer of a multi million pound World Cup deal, bringing foreign tourists by the thousand, huge advertising offerings, bucksheesh by the bucket-load and a vast advert for your nation, it must be expected that nations will play dirty. Such dirt can only be helped by the secret dealings on offer from FIFA itself. This group of men (Who? How many? Why?) from the four corners of the world are in an enviable position. Whatever deal is done we can never find information regarding it, unless Wikileaks steps in. Backroom deals remain hidden and far too many are known, sorry suspected of involvement in dubious practices already. Panorama recently a programme concerning three members of this committee and their involvement in alleged corrupt practices, Jack Warner, who may one day become president of this organisation, gave tickets to his son who made money from them some years ago it is alleged, and now Russia, with no infrastructure in place, has been given the World Cup! This nation, a dictatorship under Putin with Mafia connections throughout, has been deemed acceptable to FIFA? Was it roubles or Kalashnikovs we are right in asking here? On top of all this the voting is secret and lesser folks, the fans, are rarely allowed to know who votes for who. This surely is wrong? One man did admit, very proudly, which way he had voted some time back, the New Zealand member voted on behalf of the Oceania group and voted for Germany to hold the World Cup in spite of being ordered to vote for South Africa. He refused and gave his casting vote to the Germans as he "Did not wish to see a black nation holding the World Cup." As he was retiring from his post he cared little for anyone and departed with a smug smile on his face. His action almost ensured South Africa was to obtain the Cup in 2010. 

Was there corruption in this years bidding? Russia has money and Mafia, Quatar has billions and also no infrastructure. It does have strict Sharia Law which will find Scotsmen drinking and revealing themselves at midday in city centres a new situation to deal with! If the Danes and Irish, Germans, Brazilians and Argies also arrive in numbers it will be an interesting time for the Islamists there! Whether the best decision has been reached is debatable, England certainly could, and I think should, have won, however at least this may lead to changes in the organisation of FIFA, if we bribe them enough! 

The Sun managed one of their subtle headlines today concerning the allocation of the World Cup:-


           "FIFA BUNGS RUSSIA THE WORLD CUP!" 

I suppose it is worth mentioning that cheating, dishonest practice and dubious shenanigans is not and cannot be the 'British' (and I mean 'English') way!

Did I mention however that when England were awarded the World Cup in 1966 Englishman Sir Stanley Rous was President of FIFA! He had taken over from Arthur Drewery, another Englishman! Phew, at least these seasoned Football Association men were honest and cared only for the interest of the game! (Whether this includes England's semi final v Portugal being moved from Middlesbrough to Wembley is not known however?) There would have been no 'bungs' in those days for these well paid individuals! 

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Snow

Snow has come to the UK once again and as always it causes chaos everywhere. Snow piles up in drifts at the sides of the roads, side streets are blocked and gritter lorries never go down there, railway line at times become blocked when the points freeze, and this year the Forth Road Bridge has been closed because of the snow for the first time since its opening in 1964. Cries of woe and shock are heard everywhere, except from the kids who avoid school for a week, business it hit as workers stay at home, shops are struggling, and some folks with little cash must be freezing like I am!

When weather like this hits us, and this is early snow and very much heavier than expected, we find ourselves asking why? Why can we not cope with the weather? Why are  we not ready for this? Why is something not done? The answer is simple, money! The folks that demand lots of grit be put on the roads are the same ones in mild winter asking why so much grit needs to be stored? The failure of the railways due to the cold occurs on two or three days of the year, maybe a week at the most, and to keep on standby all year round sufficient material to ensure the trains run would cost so much there would be questions asked in parliament. There are those that mutter about Germany and Sweden coping better than us in such a winter forgetting that in those lands winter is deeper, longer, and far harsher than our short week or two. They can then spend the cash and prepare properly for the conditions. If the UK was to do this questions would be asked by all the screaming tabloids about the financial waste, and suggestions made as to how such money could be better spent! The hypocrisy is overwhelming in such papers! 

This weather has been severe, especially in the north, but the southern softies have been hit quite badly also. Coming to us from an easterly direction, starting from the Arctic circle and arriving via Siberia, Germany, the North Sea it make land on the coats and travels right up the trouser leg with a ferocity known only to those who have stood on the terracing at Gayfield Stadium, Arbroath, in February! It does the individual no good I tell ye! It will last a few days more, and already the Scottish football weekend has been almost completely wiped out. The grounds may be fit but many roads are not,and while the main roads might be open folks cannot get out of the side roads to enter them! Soon however it will end, unlike in Sweden where it will continue until the end of March or April, and by this time next week all will be forgotten by most folks. The press will return to talking about 'that marriage' and the behaviour of cretinous famous folk, the world will continue to seek gratification via the Christmas shop, and energy company directors will sit with glasses of brandy and smug grins on their overfed faces. Normality will have returned.

A more serious question requires asking however. Could it be that weather patterns are indeed changing? Can it be that 'global warming' (look outside as you read that) is occurring? Can it be that the world is going through a change, and is it short term or longer? I first read about melting ice floes around about 1968! Scientists were claiming the Arctic was beginning to shrink, but nobody cared. Now, while huge areas of Greenland are being exposed some still claim there is no 'global warming,' I wonder why? Politicians, or lying scoundrels may be a better term, fight over such things irrespective of any damage that might ensue to the world around them. A long time ahead to a politician is next week or the next election and as long as his seat is safe that is all that matters. However whether the sun is cooling, or the earth shifting or the world about to come to an end and Jesus ready to leap through to us for a final time the fact remains that something is happening around us and most people walk about looking no further than the end of their nose. Our self, that most odious part of us, will sit and watch while the world burns, or it appears, freezes as in our case today.

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St Andrews Day

Today is St Andrews Day, a saint ignored by the Scottish people for five hundred years since the reformation. He is of course of no importance today, even if the bones that monk carried with him when he landed on the Fife coast actually belonged to Andrew himself, but the nationalistic emotion is expressed through this day. Any nation treated with contempt by a bullying neighbour will magnify patriotic feeling, and the Scots pride has long been treated with contempt by English arrogance. So on a day like this, even with several inches of horrible unwanted snow making life difficult it is important for Scots everywhere to gather together, hail their nation and then go out and insult an Englishman for the good of mankind!

While Scots rightly complain of English oppression we are in a wonderful position in comparison to some in this world. In forgotten Darfur Sudanese aircraft still bomb and harass refugees, in the Democratic Congo women are still raped and men murdered by any of several rebel forces or indeed the national army itself. Many find their home to be no more than a collection of scrap metal walls or plastic sheeting, possibly lucky ones will have tents supplied by aid agencies after a natural disaster, many others will have less. While I complain about the cold I can still find heat at the touch of an expensive button, in North Korea, where it may get as low as minus 50% many do not have this luxury.

The 'Daily Telegraph' features a video of a woman so hungry and feeble she eats grass, and another fighting back when a bribe is demanded by a police officer. The mad mullahs in charge of this nation do appear to have gone too far in recent days, a change to the monetary system has left many bereft and rebellion is arising throughout the nation. While the state retains control the people once again face deprivation and starvation, and this in turn may encourage the military leaders, the ones with real power, to create a war situation in an attempt to save themselves. While the people starve and the powerful fret we can carry on regardless towards another 'Merry Christmas,' and all that brings. Hopefully the girl in this video is still alive by Christmas.....

                                 The Daily Telegraph North Korean Report  

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Dreich

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This is a good shot of the early morning, at least MY early morning! Cold, snow covered, and generally miserable. Just like me I suggest! The several inches of snow up north do not make me jealous.  I don't like the cold and I want to be somewhere warm, beside the sea, and with a pretty young girl attending to my needs.


Fat chance!

He is 80, a multi millionaire, and recently they were attacked and robbed of jewellery worth £200,000.
I just wonder what a 31 year old lass would see in a multi millionaire who travels the world constantly, has a weak heart and has recently suffered a terrible shock? What does he see in a girl slightly older than one of his daughters? Does she perhaps share a love of Formula 1?

Wiki Leaks have revealed that political folk talk about one another and do not always like what they see! Arabs have been demanding the US remove the Iranian nuclear threat, US ambassadors have been offering honest appraisals of world leaders, and one of our Princes (just what does he do?) has been pretending he is his father and putting his foot in it. I wonder why the politicians are claiming Wki leaks are dangerous? have they something to fear....? This tells us nothing we did not guess already, it just brings it into the open.   

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Why It's Good To Be A Man...

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Men

1.           Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

2.          Movie nudity is virtually always female.

3.          You know stuff about tanks.

4.          A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.

5.         Sunday Afternoon Football.

6.          You don’t have to monitor your friends sex lives.

7.          Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.

8.          You can open all your own jars.

9.          Old friends don’t give you crap if you’ve lost or gained weight.

10.      Dry cleaners and haircutter’s don’t rob you blind.

11.       When clicking through the channel, you don’t have to stall on every shot of someone crying.

12.       Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.

13.       All your orgasms are real.

14.      A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite sex.

15.       Guys in hockey masks don’t attack you.

16.       You don’t have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go.

17.       You understand why Jokes are funny.

18.       You can go to the bathroom with out a support group.

19.       Your last name stays put.

20.      You can leave a hotel bed unmade.

21.       When your work is criticized, you don’t have to panic that everyone secretly hates you.

22.      You can kill your own food.

23.      The garage is all yours.

24.      You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

25.      You see the humor in Terms of Endearment.

26.      Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow.

27.      You never have to clean the toilet.

28.      You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes.

29.      Sex means never worrying about your reputation.

30.      Wedding plans take care of themselves.

31.       If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.

32.      Your underwear is £5 for a three pack.

33.      The Cheerleaders are to be looked at.

34.      None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry.

35.      You don’t have to shave below your neck.

36.      You don’t have to curl up next to a hairy ass every nite.

37.      If you’re 34 and single nobody notices.

38.      You can write your name in the snow.

39.      You can get into a nontrivial pissing contest.

40.     Everything on your face stays its original color.

41.      Chocolate is just another snack.

42.      You can be President.

43.      You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat.

44.     Flowers fix everything.

45.      You never have to worry about other people’s feelings.

46.      You get to think about sex 90% of your waking hours.

47.      You can wear a white shirt to a water park.

48.      Three pair of shoes are more than enough.

49.      You can eat a banana in a hardware store.

50.      You can say anything and not worry about what people think.

51.       Foreplay is optional.

52.      Michael Bolton doesn’t live in your universe.

53.      Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you walk into the room.

54.      You can whip your shirt off on a hot day.

55.      You don’t have to clean your apartment if the meter reader is coming by.

56.      You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting laid.

57.      Car mechanics tell you the truth.

58.      You don’t give a rat’s ass if someone notices your new haircut.

59.      You can watch a game in silence with you buddy for hours without even thinking (He must be mad at me)

60.      The world is your urinal.

61.       You never misconstrue innocuous statements to mean your lover is about to leave you.

62.      You get to jump up and slap stuff.

63.      Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

64.      One mood, all the time.

65.      You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him.

66.      You never have to drive to another gas station because this one’s just too skeevy.

67.      You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.

68.      You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are wearing.

69.      Same work….more pay.

70.      Gray hair and wrinkles add character.

71.       You don’t have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment.

72.      Wedding Dress £2000; Tux rental £100.

73.      You don’t care if someone is talking about you behind your back.

74.      With 400 million sperm per shot, you could double the earth’s population in 15 tries, at least in theory.

75.      You don’t mooch off others’ desserts.

76.      If you retain water, it’s in a canteen.

77.      The remote is yours and yours alone.

78.      People never glance at your chest when you’re talking to them.

79.      ESPN’s sports center.

80.      You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift.

81.       Bachelor parties whomp ass over bridal showers.

82.      You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mother.

83.      You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked.

84.      You needn’t pretend you’re “freshening up” to go to the bathroom.

85.      If you don’t call your buddy when you say you will, he won’t tell you friends you’ve changed.

86.      Someday you’ll be a dirty old man.

87.      You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase “F*#k it!”

88.      If an other guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might become lifelong buddies.

89.      Princess Di’s death was just another obituary.

90.      The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

91.       You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you’re not in the mood.

92.      You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny.

93.      If something mechanical didn’t work, you can bash it with a hammer and throw it across the room.

94.      New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

95.      Porn movies are designed with your mind in mind.

96.      You don’t have to remember everyone’s birthdays and anniversaries.

97.      Not liking a person does not preclude having great sex with them.

98.      Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: “So…notice anything different?”

99.      Baywatch

100.  There is always a game on somewhere.

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