Sunday 9 October 2011

Brain Dead Sunday

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This was not stolen from the Ben Lomand Free Press, honest....






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Saturday 8 October 2011

Almost Derelict

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Before the sun was up this morning, and it never bothered to get up in truth, I wandered out to catch the early worm.  My eating habits are not what they were!  Passing one of the crows so intent on removing a snail from its shell it allowed me within four feet of himself before he looked up, somewhat irritably, and glared as I moved away.  Not much else moved even though the market was opening up. This line of garages manages to look almost derelict and because nobody had bothered to rise I took this snap.  Usually the doors are open and mechanics are very busy chatting while attempting to work out how much to overcharge the car owner who's precious beast is undergoing surgery there.  It may well be these are just the workshops of the building on the right that constantly offers large cars at bargain prices.  They do not mention such cars are cheap to buy and horrendous to run!  Petrol, repairs, spare parts all cost a fortune, that is why muggins (always men who have watched 'Top Gear') falls for the cheap prices.  I would like to take better pics of these but some folks like to call the constabulary for some reason.  


    
As winter is closing in let's have a warmer picture for Saturday night. 'Off Scarborough,' by Ernest Dade. Very nice and makes me want to go to sea again.  It's not that I once went to sea, it's just that I wanted to go to sea once before.  I didn't, it was too cold.


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Friday 7 October 2011

Friday Mix

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Did the economy collapse again? Everyone is saying there's no more Jobs.

The media has been full of adulation for this man Jobs.  I find myself a bit underwhelmed. He may have been bright, inventive and very clever at getting his creations sold worldwide, but was he that important?  Did people see his 'Mac' and 'iPod' as earth changing, or did his fans see him as the good one and Bill Gates as the bad perhaps?  Gates certainly has not made friends by his attitudes and behaviour, but was Jobs any better? Gates at least is known to have given away masses of money, Jobs appears to have kept his £8 billion. This man has been almost worshipped in the media, several articles in all papers and histories of his life, his work and so on and on.  He died from a horrible disease, and that is terrible, his active m,ind created some interesting machines (which I have never used) but does the hero worship not reveal the empty part of us that needs a God to look up to?  Clever he may be, but surely the coverage is overblown?

   

This is the 'Swan' tavern.  You can tell that by the name 'Swan' written on the front.  I had a look through the web but in spite of this pub standing here since at least 1560, and some similar creation probably dates back for a thousand or two years before this, I could find no relevant information regarding this pubs history,  except a list of names of landlords for some years back.  How sad I thought.  Mind you it is some years since swans were found around here, ugly ducklings yes, swans no!


Intellectual Political debate in the USA reaches new heights! 
Is that you Max?...... Jerry?
I bet he's from the South!



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Thursday 6 October 2011

River

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I found myself by the river again this afternoon.  Lucky I found myself otherwise I may not have got home again!  The council have been improving the muddy track that has been in use possibly for thousands of years by tarmacadaming it.  The improvements I am sure have nothing to do with the building of new houses on the flood plain part of the river!  This involved the cutting down of dozens of old trees and their replacement with homes for those who can afford one.  I think more are to be added and the newcomers probably do not appreciate walking through mud like some of us did, well sort off.  It is likely this will indeed improve the river walk, and about time some say, but will they replace the trees?  Will they replace them with oaks or some popular cheap replacement I wonder?  We gain on one hand and lose on the other.  "It's a funny old world Saint," as a glove puppet once remarked.


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Wednesday 5 October 2011

Wha's like us? A study in humility

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Wha's Like us?

As the average Englishman moves about the home he calls his castle, watch him enjoy a typical English breakfast of toast and marmalade invented by Mrs Keiller of Dundee, Scotland; see him slipping into his national costume, a soiled raincoat, patented by Charles MacIntosh, a Glasgow druggist; and follow his footsteps over the linoleum flooring invented in Kirkcaldy, Scotland.

On The Road Out he goes - along the English lane surfaced by John MacAdam of Ayr, Scotland (known as the MacAdamised road), smoking an English cigarette, first manufactured by Robert Croag of Perthshire, Scotland. He hops aboard an English bus, which is using tyres invented by John Boyd Dunlop, of Dreghorn, Scotland and later completes his journey by rail. (A reminder the James Watt of Greenock, Scotland invented the Steam Engine).

 At the office he is presented with the morning mail containing adhesive stamps invented by John Chalmers of Dundee, Scotland; and periodically during the day, he reaches for the telephone, invented by Alexander Graham Bell, born of Scottish parents.

At home in the evening, our English cousins wife is preparing his national dish of roast beef of old England - prime Aberdeen Angus, raised in Aberdeenshire, Scotland. This sets the patriotic heart beating a little faster, and he enters the dining room whistling "Ye Mariners of England" written and composed by Thomas Campbell of Glasgow, Scotland. After dinner there follows a scene typical of English domestic bliss. Young Albert is packed off to Boys Brigade, founded by Sir William Smith of Glasgow, Scotland; Ted goes to the Scouts, the present Chief of which is Sir Charles MacLean of Duart, Scotland; and little Ethel plays on her bicycle, invented by Kirkpatrick MacMillan, a blacksmith of Dumfries, Scotland. Mother, in the kitchen, bleaches clothes with bleach invented by James McGregor of Glasgow, Scotland. dad listens to the news on the television, invented by John Logie Baird of Helensburgh, Scotland, and hears an item about the United States Navy, founded by John Paul Jones, of Kirkbean, Scotland. Maybe, just maybe, he will remember that the radar with which the U.S. and other fleets are equipped was invented by Sir Robert A. Watson Watt, of Brechin, Scotland.  Once the children come home, Dad supervises the homework, using logarithms invented by John Napier of Edinburgh. The English course contains familiar books such as "Treasure Island" by Robert Louis Stevenson, and "Robinson Crusoe", based on the life of Alex Selkirk, of, Lower Largo, Fife, Scotland.

If by now he has been reminded too much of Scotland, he may in desperation pick up the bible - here at last to have something without Scottish associations; but he is disillusioned - the first man mentioned in the bible is a Scot, James VI, who authorised its translation. Its hopeless. Nowhere he can turn to escape the efficiency and ingenuity of the Scots. He could take a drink - but we supply the best in the world. He could stick his head in the oven - but the coal gas was discovered by William Murdoch of Ayr, Scotland. He could take rifle and blow his brains out, but. of course the breach loading rifle was invented by a Scot. Anyway, if he survived, injured, he would simple find himself on an operating table, injected with Penicillin, discovered by Alexander Flaming of Darvel, Scotland; given an anaesthetic discovered by James Young Simpson of Bathgate, Scotland; and operated on be antiseptic surgery pioneered at Glasgow Royal Infirmary. On coming out of the anaesthetic, he would probable take no comfort in learning from his surgeon that he was as safe as the Bank of England, founded by William Paterson of Dumfries, Scotland.

Poor fellows only hope would be to receive a transfusion of good SCOTs blood which would entitle him to ask



"Wha's like us?
Gie few and thur aw deed!"


p.s. it is a known fact that the vast majority of clever Americans have Scots blood flowing through their brains.






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Tuesday 4 October 2011

Gas Works Chimney

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Too brain dead to write the earth shatteringly important 
post that I had intended.  Instead here we have a picture 
of the disused gas works chimney.  

I know you will enjoy this as you are all art lovers.



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Monday 3 October 2011

Last Sunshine?

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I snapped this bright blue sky this afternoon as I suspect this may be the last hot day of the year.  They say the temperature will drop considerably over the next few days, that the remains of another US hurricane will be deposited over us, with the accompanying winds to boot!  It appears a proper autumn is upon us now.  I may not go out for the next six months!  





As some enjoyed the portrait of Reynolds I add another, Lady Colin Campbell painted by Giovanni Boldini in 1897.  I first saw this large impressive painting in the English National Portrait Gallery, which you ought to visit, and was very impressed by it. The impression I received is dimmed somewhat by the restrictions of a blog, but this is a marvellous portrait. 


Gertrude Elizabeth Blood, who married Lord Colin Campbell and joined a higher social society than that in which she was bred.  However he was a philanderer and appears to have passed on a nasty disease to her. The following divorce caused a sensation (yawn) and high society rejected her in spite of he being to blame.  Well they were all at it were they not?  They still are, no morals among the high society at any time.  She turned to literary work and mixed in artistic circles. She died in 1911 in her early fifties. 
Check the link for more.


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Sunday 2 October 2011

This is how it should be!

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Rudi Skacel who opened the scoring with a thunderous drive.



Ryan Stevenson who finished the job

The Heart of Midlothian defeated the Celtic by two goals to nil this afternoon.  


This is how it should be!

When I began trudging to Tynecastle I expected us to defeat the grim Glasgow ogres, and indeed everyone else.  This is how Scottish football ought to be, us winning, the league being open, and the Heart of Midlothian being the team to beat!  


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Saturday 1 October 2011

Joshua Reynolds

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I like portraits.  This self portrait of Sir Joshua Reynolds is particularly good I thought. Instead of the usual sidelong glance and hands akimbo that we often see here he has cleverly put his hand over his eyes and brought life to the portrait.  Very good indeed I say!


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Friday 30 September 2011

How to be an Idiot No. 87

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Yesterday the lovely Jenny Woolf informed m that today would be better.  She was wrong! Quite how such an intelligent well traveled woman could think things would improve escapes me for the moment, but wrong she was.  Last night I went very early to bed, just in case I set fire to something, and rose as expected totally knackered yet unable to sleep on at 6:30.  By 7:30 I had wandered around Sainsburys, early to escape the hordes of Friday women shoppers barging their trolleys into one and all, and gathered my few requirements.  All was going swimmingly!  The shop was empty, I avoided the staff filling shelves and even evaded the trolleys they pushed hither and thither.


It was when I emptied the basket (I always use a basket as it is quicker and easier to evade women with trolleys) on to the belt where the almost friendly half asleep Phillipino awaited my goods. It was then I allowed the basket to over balance and dropped the brown sauce onto the floor. "Dearie dearie me," or something, said the supervisor at who's feet the bottle landed.  She was not referring to the brown sludge at her feet, she was referring to me lying on the floor crying "Not again! Not today also!" for several minutes.  They helped me out quite quickly after this.


By 10:30 I had locked myself indoors, dropped the milk out of the fridge, barged into the furniture while hoovering,lost dozens of cassette tapes down the back of the unit in unreachable places but as yet have not set fire to anything. I updated the answers to the comments, as I had forgotten them for several days while looking for my head.  Now I am back off to bed, wake me when it is safe to come out again!





"If at first you don't succeed, give up and go to bed!" 
Robert the Bruce.


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Thursday 29 September 2011

How to be an Idiot No. 86.

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The day was destined to be bad.  I woke sluggishly to the gentle sound of Gregorian chant, chased those monks away from my window, and headed of into a day of woe.  I felt a bit hebetudinous and went around making a mess of things. Failing to type correctly, putting the tea bag in the cup, then doing it again, and wondering why the world appeared a bit 'off,'  I then put my glasses on and the world returned to some sort of normality. Having to sign for my scrounging layabouts allowance today I had to ensure the paperwork was up to date, it was, somewhat.  I then sauntered around to the dole, wearing my jacket, and found my penthouse condominium fails once again to inform me of the weather outside. Inside it was chilly, outside it was very warm indeed.  Sweltering I scribbled something that once was my name and in the following short conversation I said things I regretted afterwards.  "What an idiot," I thought!  My big mouth!  I then went home, sweltering, hitting myself as I went.


This afternoon I went into the town again, see above 'Jumbo' the old water tower, now I believe converted into living quarters.  Naturally I was out the door into a higher temperature again wearing the jacket as I had forgotten the warmth.  I did notice one side effect was the lassies insistence on making the most of the years last few hot days by stripping off as much as possible.  If only I had taken one of those famous blue tablets the spam merchants are always offering!  The meeting, with yet another man who suggested what has already been attempted, went as well as could be expected. I made my way back to the station happy I had not made any more stupid remarks or done any foolish things.  The train journey was short and sweet and I happily changed for my connection.  A train stood on the platform and I glanced at the monitor informing me of the 'Liverpool St' Destination.  I did not however notice the time!  I sauntered past the waiting train and stood idly gazing down the track at the distant signals and fast disappearing train I had just left.  I mused on the Kestral high above circling around and around, scaring even the crows who rose to greet him.  I watched an attractive dark haired lass give me the "drop dead creep" look, I noticed a station operative (we used to call them porters) enter a locked room with a teenage lad and a police officer (he unlocked the room before entering before you ask).  The 'Beep Beep' sound came from the train.  The doors closed and I watched as it began the journey to London.  "Hello I thought, why is he reversing?" He was not reversing, he was my train and I had misread the times on the monitor!  I waited a full hour, in the heat, until the next train (full of London commuters) arrived.  


It's all becoming a bit of a circus actually


I am off to the 'Deed Poll Office' tomorrow to change my name to 'Dostoevsky Idiot,' as this seems to me to be more appropriate.  




There is a train down there somewhere with a few very irritated passengers.  I suspect the driver may well be a relative....


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Wednesday 28 September 2011

Tuesday 27 September 2011

Ladybirds

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As an experiment I used the feeble 'Macro' on this camera in an effort to picture the ladybird on the park bench.  She posed happily while I pussyfooted around and when at home I used the HP system to crop and enlarge the pic.  This is the best I can do with the little camera and I am quite pleased with this.  The beasts colour makes her very popular, especially with kids, and the children's storybooks called 'ladybird Books' have sold around the world. These are of course just beetles and if they were black most folk would turn away from them as unattractive.  Gardeners love them as each of these beauties can devour 5000 aphids in their year long life.  They are so good at this that they have been deliberately introduced into the USA to deal with the aphid problem there. Lovely beasts and very popular, except when strong winds bring billions over from France and swarm all over the south of England.  


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Monday 26 September 2011

Political Party Conferences

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Monday sees the real opening of the Labour Party Conference.  Once again the news will be filled with the speeches, the outpourings of a variety of suited men and coiffured women, most of whom will remain unknown until their retirement.  Leading actors (and this is a good word here) will flit across the screen pouting and lying with little real understanding of what to do about the major economic problems of the day.  Ideology, all too often ill thought out by the present bunch in the 'House,' will govern they speech while underneath the real purpose of every word you hear is "I want to be King!"


As you will know the Labour Party grew among working men who suffered appalling conditions while the rich enjoyed the benefits of both Empire and their workers slog.  Change had to come and now, after two major wars, years of depression, and several self seeking governments we have a wealthy nation confused and fearful of global economic collapse.  What does this Labour Party, under it's somewhat insipid leader, have to say to those losing their jobs, homes and hope?  Nothing  except words I suspect.  While millions suffer the majority have much, much more than they really require, a complacency exists among many who still have an income, and many talk of 'poverty' while real poverty is only found abroad in the Third World still. 


One year, when I was rich, I had a year off and done a course with the Open University and done occasional temporary work to keep sufficient funds for luxuries, like bread and mince.  I also watched all three major parties conferences, and I am not sure I could stomach this again.  The liberal Democrats at that time were far from government, had lots of talk, many ideas, most hair-brained, and spent much time lying to camera while planning to stab one another in the back.  The Labour Party, sorry, 'New Labour,' were very different.  In days of yore the conference debated all major policy points, not by the time of Tony Blair.  Only his agenda was followed and all went smoothly, except those speaking lies to camera while stabbing each other straight in the cheat!  The Labour folk never hid their differences.  The then governing Tories were "All together fighting the socialists" while lying to camera with false smiles and stabbing one another in the back.  I just cannot bear, or is that bare, to think what it will be like when they meet this year.  Cameron the PR guru will be more airbrushed than ever, the speeches full of self satisfied bumf and the leading millionaires will wander around looking down on their fellows smug in the knowledge that they, and their tax avoided millions in foreign banks, cannot be touched.  


The populace, w will just have to make do and mend with this lot for a while.  No beliefs, no policies that work, no real idea how to handle the real economic danger, and I have the feeling we are sleepwalking to disaster.  You know I agreed with this early this morning, "No sense in being pessimistic, it wouldn't work anyway," But now I am not so sure!


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Sunday 25 September 2011

Sunday Mist Rising

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There are three main benefits from rising early on a Sunday morning.  One is the sight of the rising sun clearing away the mist that lies in the valley.  This allows some lovely pictures, if you have a longer lens than my little camera possesses.  The second benefit is the healthy body that is obtained by riding the bike up slopes you did not realise were around that bend you had never ventured along before.  This is enhanced when you get to the end and discover this is a dead end and the road sign has been removed by person or persons unknown when leaving the 'Six Bells' late one night.  A certain desire to knock 'Six Bells' out of them crosses the cyclists mind at this point. The third benefit arrives after lunch when watching the poor picture of the Heart of Midlothian being roundly stuffed by St Johnstone you find the drowsiness overtaking you so that you manage to miss much of the slaughter!  I suppose there is a fourth benefit not connected to the early morning, the mental exercise caused by asking who the Heart of Midlothian's next manager might be, Derek McInnes anyone...?


Saturday 24 September 2011

Misty Dawn

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The best part of this Saturday was the sight of mist rolling, cloud like, across the park. Dragging my bulk from the bundle of rags that for a bed I strolled out to take pictures.  A few moments later I returned and put some clothes on and tried again.  As luck would have it the mist was rolling away southwards which meant the park was being bathed in bright sunshine and high above the sky was increasingly turning blue.  The only thing to do was saunter around and hope the exercise would wake me out of my slumber.  As I sauntered I noticed how the mist was gathering over the town centre.  I headed that way and grabbed a couple of shots where the mist hid the run down appearance of one of the grubbier streets.  The houses are not actually bad, and the people whom I have met are indeed fine examples of decent humanity but the actual road is somewhat depressing itself.

  
I wandered around and ended up back in the park where the local drunk stood talking to the park in the manner he usual  keeps for the town centre.  Poor man, his head was blown away by drink and drugs long ago and now spends his days drinking himself into Hades.  What state his liver is in I hate to think.  We all talk to ourselves but not usually loudly amongst crowds in the busy Market Place. I pictured him from afar but fell some guilt.  I am not keen on 'candid' shots as this appears to me to be an intrusion.  However it did look a good opportunity, although I am not sure if he realised what I was doing or not.  


The bright weather that followed the removal of the mist by the suns heat was followed later by some of those big dark clouds that fill too many Autumn days.  Still, pics are possible here also, if the battery in the camera does not give out!  




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Friday 23 September 2011

Thursday 22 September 2011

A Life on the Ocean Wave, sort off....

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During the years of London life I took a real fancy to living on one of these narrowboats that are found on Britain's canals.  While in times past these boats were the main trunkroads from the late 1700's until the railways arrived and more or less put most off them out of business today they form the living quarters of some who cannot afford house prices or wish for a different kind of existence.  Many of course are used as holiday lets and groups or families will travel at a reckless 4 miles an hour along the canals, stopping off at Marinas or perhaps making do with a quiet backwater.  With London towering all around me I thought the idea of sitting at the back of one of these boats, whatever the weather, drinking my coffee and enjoying the greenery around looked like a scene from paradise. OK, I might fall into one of the locks now and again, but you cannot get everything can you? It still appears quite attractive although I can see the sky these days and the desperate desire for grass, sky and the refreshment of body and spirit that creation gives has lessened somewhat because of where I now dwell.  One day, when rich, I might make one of these my escape to the country for a weekend, if I can afford the boat, the berth fees, the maintenance costs, and so on and on and on.  It might be cheaper than a house but finding a quiet berth, paying the costs, and then avoiding holiday makers escaping London would be a pain!  However I continue to dream....




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Wednesday 21 September 2011

Tuesday 20 September 2011

Tuesday Rant

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The trip into the big town yesterday left two imprints on my bitter and twisted mind.  The first came when the chap who's time I waste for half an hour or so informed me that he was being moved to a different situation.  From next week he will be dealing with the 18-24 year olds as there is a big problem there. The problem is simple, they don't turn up!  Large numbers of unemployed youth are not bothering to arrive on time, attend the meetings, or do the courses on offer and the reason is they just 'don't want to!'  Now I recall  that I felt a similar attitude when in my teens however family pressure (work or stave) 'encouraged'  me to work badly in the places I was employed.  The girls throwing themselves at me also helped of course.  Oh yes they did!  Today however it is apparent that there is indeed a type who do not wish to do anything and apparently are getting away with it.  These young folk, always referred to as 'underclass' by the right wing press, do appear happy to live of the state and do nothing but take drugs, play with the girls and enjoy life.  Hmmm maybe they have something after all?  However this lot will find themselves off the programme in the next couple of weeks and possibly with a loss of dole money.  That will please the 'Daily Mail' reader. Strange how every person over 25, aged, disabled, redundant or just plain stupid (what you looking at me for?) always turns up for appointments, does what is asked and actually looks for employment of some sort, and not just for the money.  Is it just an age thing or is it society as it is offered today I wonder?  Age does change the responsible attitude however the kids usually have at least one parent and they appear not to care either.  I wonder if it is just life as she is lived, which brings me on to the 'Metro.'


The 'Metro' is a free paper given out at railways stations and found littering the seats at every stop.  No-one appears willing to actually take the thing home!  I picked one up yesterday and found it full of adverts and showbusiness news,  celebs activities and page after page of nothingness presented as important!  Is it just me being old or is it that the reality presented to us today is a sham, and nothing but?  It was on page 25 I discovered some news, floods in Pakistan.  Thousands homeless and many dead, yet a Rap 'artist' banned from 'The 'X' Factor' precedes this by several pages.  Age changes us but what filled the pages was nothing but emptiness to me.  The world is turning into plastic and things that really matter are fading fast behind a false image.  'The 'X' Factor' type shows, with their overhyped audience, the false voting system and the 'star' who invariably claims to be 'gay' a year later when the money runs out, offers a 'plastic' world.  Of course such shows do have a place, but it seems to me this is all on offer.  In the sixties life was full of revolution.  The false was to be stripped away and a new, better life was to be found.  It was of course a delusion, human nature never changes, but it was an effort to improve life as well as enjoy it.  Today is all about 'Self!'  Liberalism has trapped us in a  world of self satisfying, emotion led, wealth deserving life.  'If it feels good do it, ' has led us into 'If you want it have it,' and the consequences are not thought through.  Our forefathers were lucky.  In their day they had wars and depressions and a need to build a better life to ensure reality was in front of them.  Today we have had years of wealth, all our basic needs attended to, and now live rudderless and lost in a sea of sham.




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