Monday 1 September 2014

Now What Seems to be the Trouble...



So I coughed my way into the surgery this morning, earlier than my body wished, and was confronted by a friendly, efficient receptionist.  She answered my few questions and without raising an eye answered patiently when  asked if this nurse had a police record.  The negative answer was encouraging but I always wonder if receptionists tell the truth.
With visions of Hancock's 'The Blood Donor,' running through my mind I discovered the nurse, like all nurses, was personable, efficient, attractive and professional, as I expected.  This being the NHS it was also free, not counting all the taxes I have paid over the years of course.  A well run surgery in spite of crowded conditions.  The immigrants into town in recent years, mostly from London it must be said, have led to overcrowding as people commute to work, the town being ideal for those with young families.  At one point the surgery closed itself to new folks signing on as they could not cope.  
Today the modernised surgery abounds with electronic gadgets, my computerised medical record (sold by this government without our permission to who knows who), a machine to gauge my (higher than it ought) Blood pressure plus a small gadget ("I don't know what makes it work," she said encouragingly) used to measure the blood, cholesterol good and bad, and other things.  The blood pressure was up, possibly it was the fear of a needle, but all else was as expected.  The result she said gently and with great care, is that I am a big fat slob!  The list of banned foods (cheese, no more cheese - I'll die!) is enormous, the exercise I must now increasingly indulge in is well,... impossible! All I have to do is lose two stones of ugly fat, by tomorrow or she said I must report to Mr Robinson in Manor Street.
Mr Robinson is an undertaker.
Oh yes, and she booked me in to see her friend in a fortnight, and booked it herself 'in case I forgot!' My blood pressure is rising again...


I began my exercise straight away after a small lunch.  Well after a small lunch actually.  I wandered around the town, the first time for a week, and felt knackered!  How can I be like this?


Transfer deadline day and many will find themselves watching Jim "I support Rangers" White as he explodes from within with fake excitement as the day nears its end.  This day can surely cause excitement for many but with football prices reaching stratospheric levels not all clubs can participate. However with clubs desperate to climb the league, avoid relegation struggles or feel the need to impress others with their cash flow players at all levels will move today, sometimes surprisingly.  I doubt it will involve the Heart of Midlothian as we have brought several quality players in already but there is always the possibility someone will feel the need to spend large amounts of cash on our exciting young talents.  I will avoid Jim White myself, I have felt sick enough this past few weeks, and will pick up relevant news as and when.  



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6 comments:

Lee said...

I'm glad to hear (well, see by reading your words) that you finally went for a check-up, Mr. Ad-Man.

I hope you do follow the advice given you; I'm sure you will. :)

Carol said...

Well I am so glad you made it to the surgery ~ even if the diagnosis was what was to be expected. I will be your exercise buddy. If you go for a walk every day, I will too. How does that sound?

soubriquet said...

do you have blogger?

Adullamite said...

Lee, Advice, I got a letter today calling me in for more tests, that's TWO more bullying nurses to see.

Carol, Walk? er, I suppose I must. Where do we meet?

Soub, I certainly don't have Jogger!

Unknown said...

Again, what is it that you are supposed to be keeping stiff?

Adullamite said...

Jerry, You!